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Inactivity as of late - Feedbacks!
(11-09-2013, 12:15 AM)Reigen Wrote: From what I understand: If someone is harassing you outside of coth, we will still police it. What people say between friends is another story. If person X is talking with person Y about person Z, then the logs are invalid because we have no right to police what is spoken between friends. However if person X is harassing person Z to their face, then it does become an issue.

See. Wish I would have known that, because it conflicts the many different things I'm told.

To be honest? I don't know what's the "right" way and the "wrong" way with CoTH anymore on a -lot- of things.

I think there needs to be clear, clear, CLEAR and cut definitions of rules and punishments. There's too much grey area. Waaaay too much.
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(11-09-2013, 12:15 AM)Kage Wrote: Just a little bit of a note I figure I should interject in here now.

In all my years I've noticed very little amounts of people on this server trust one another. Doesn't seem like a community when everyone is second guessing and glancing over your shoulder half the time~ (Personal opinion for once!) Someone! Prove me wrong! (I mean that literally. Please do. There has to be -someone- on this server other then me who trusts the people on here unless they prove that they don't deserve the trust)

I trust one person on here.

The rest, honestly? I have had enough 'friends', people I have known for years and been close with be dillweeds and say and tell personal things to other people as jokes. Or even just turn on you over stupid, immature things.

You learn not to trust the internet after a while.
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(11-09-2013, 12:18 AM)Cressy Wrote:
(11-09-2013, 12:15 AM)Kage Wrote: Just a little bit of a note I figure I should interject in here now.

In all my years I've noticed very little amounts of people on this server trust one another. Doesn't seem like a community when everyone is second guessing and glancing over your shoulder half the time~ (Personal opinion for once!) Someone! Prove me wrong! (I mean that literally. Please do. There has to be -someone- on this server other then me who trusts the people on here unless they prove that they don't deserve the trust)

I trust one person on here.

The rest, honestly? I have had enough 'friends', people I have known for years and been close with be dillweeds and say and tell personal things to other people as jokes. Or even just turn on you over stupid, immature things.

You learn not to trust the internet after a while.

Trusting the internet and trusting a site filled with people who call themselves a community should be two different things. If this isn't the case, then we're not a community, and we should stop calling ourself as such. (Once more begging for someone to prove me wrong. That's a depressing thought I'd rather not be true)
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(11-09-2013, 12:18 AM)Harmonic Wrote:
(11-09-2013, 12:15 AM)Reigen Wrote: From what I understand: If someone is harassing you outside of coth, we will still police it. What people say between friends is another story. If person X is talking with person Y about person Z, then the logs are invalid because we have no right to police what is spoken between friends. However if person X is harassing person Z to their face, then it does become an issue.

See. Wish I would have known that, because it conflicts the many different things I'm told.

To be honest? I don't know what's the "right" way and the "wrong" way with CoTH anymore on a -lot- of things.

I think there needs to be clear, clear, CLEAR and cut definitions of rules and punishments. There's too much grey area. Waaaay too much.

It's reasons like this I started the decision archive so when an issue comes up, we have a change-log of sorts so people know when it's been updated. If anyone is confused about any rule that you see on the server, please PM me and I'll get a thread up so the GMs can work on better clarifying the rule. We've got a couple in progress already, but there might be some things we think are obvious but aren't really to others and they ought to be pointed out to us.

But for all intents and purposes, what I said above is solid from what I last know on that discussion. If someone harasses you over steam, skype, MSN, AOL, Yahoo, email ect ect ect, send us logs and we will act.
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Just because we are in a community, doesn't mean we have to trust one another. I live in a nice community, we are active in each others lives. But there is a weird guy that lives kiddycorner to me and I would never trust him.

Doesn't mean we aren't a community, just means that you can't trust everyone you meet.
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Thing is, more often then not everyone is viewed as the creepy guy down on the corner. In the sense that people get chosen to be on this sever there shouldn't be the creepy guy. I'm not saying people should be telling every one another about their lives, but I trust every person on this server to do the right thing whether ICly or OOCly until they prove otherwise. Benifit of the doubt kind of thing. You all view people as the creepy guy before getting to know them. (PLease prove me wrong. More depressing thoughts I don't want true but seem to be the reality)
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I view everyone as creepy before I meet them. Only because of what I have experienced in life (and my time on the internet) has caused me to be this way. I'm a pessimist, I look for the worst in life. There are optimists on here. I am just one person in a sea of many.
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Trusting other members in the community doesn't just mean being able to confide in them and believe they won't tell others what you told them or any of that. It can also mean something as simple as believing what they say. Believing that when they tell you something, especially something that's none of your business, you can just nod, mark it as the truth, and move on. But there's a lack of that here too. People tend to just not believe others and even question things it's not their place to question.
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Trust me, Kage. You can't make everyone happy. Sometimes you just rub others the wrong way, sometimes other rub you the wrong way. We aren't all going to get along---but we all at -least- should be given the same opportunities as others on here, which is my point. Someone is being a jerk? They should be dealt with, regardless of who they are friends with, or what some other situation is. Every time.

That was my point originally. The idea that we'd all get along is... well, not something that will ever happen.
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Oh! That's a much better way to put it then I did. Lack of -believing- one another. Yeah. It's one thing to not open up to someone cause of reasons that we all probably have then to question what another person does without getting to know them first. Muuuch better wording then I could figure out with my lack of sleep mind!
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(11-09-2013, 12:27 AM)Kage Wrote: You all view people as the creepy guy before getting to know them. (PLease prove me wrong. More depressing thoughts I don't want true but seem to be the reality)

If you mean a person that you can't trust because you don't know them well? Sure, that's usually the case. If you actually mean that we view somebody as creepy before we get to know them? Not really. At least that's not the case with me. It takes a lot to creep me out. :|

But really? People generally see the creepy guy as creepy because they haven't gone to the lengths of understanding the person.

And then there are genuinely creepy people. Which is another story.
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I trust people in CotH... :(
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I trust people on CotH to varying degrees. I treat everyone I meet in-game, whether or not I know who they are, with respect. Now of course I have my friends who I trust more than my IRL friends (Woo for friend issues) but I still think everyone deserves respect here. We are a community for the sheer reason that we are all here because we enjoy what the server brings.

I honestly prefer being here over going out with my IRL friends and when things like this happen and people are arguing over small things, it makes me sad because this is my home.
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Trust has nothing to do with getting along with someone. Trust is believing someone will do what their suppose to. In a community? I'd trust pretty much everyone. The creepy dude? I'd get to know him. If he turns out to have dolls in his basement? Never talking to him again. Turns out the dude lived a long life and did so much for the world and the creepy side that you see is the repercussion of something terrible that happened to him and he's probably the nicest guy you've ever met? .. Well he's the nicest guy you've ever met.

Ya'll turn your back on people you don't know more often then not. Its what happened when I first joined. Its what happened after my year break after I joined, it happened last year, and it happened when I came back from my ban and I saw new players joining. It happens. A lot. This server isn't a community when I rarely see any "Welcome to the neighborhood!" cakes anymore. You get one or two people being nice. The rest. "Meh, new person. Who cares." I see it happen. A lot. I dislike it -intensely-

And I agree with Corvus. To an extent. Coth is my home. I missed it terribly when I was banned and I'm happy as can be I was able to come back. But when it comes to arguing? Especially over the little things? Stuff needs to be said. It needs to be if Coth is going to move on. Sweep it under the rug and eventually the rug wont cover all the dirt. Is it depressing that people are arguing? Yeah. But it needs to happen if Coth is going to get better.
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On the issue of trust, I trust just about everyone on here except for, yes, you're reading this right, myself. I know myself in a trust fight, I KNOW -I- am the one always trying to find a way to get my character into the upperhand. It's a bad habit and that's why I don't trust myself.

On the topic of leaving/staying, I enjoy being on here. It's like a second home away (despite being at home) from home. A place to escape the RL stress and issues. EVERYONE in game I try to treat with respect but honestly, respect is earnt in my eyes, not just a given. Sure I try to respect you but if you don't respect me, why would I respect you?

On the topic of arguing, SOLVE IT, the parties involved, whether it's two people or the entire server, go into a talk with each other, stay at the metaphorical table until you have a solution. Find agreements, appointments and whatnot but try to fix it. If no solution is found, I'd just like to point out that little /ignore command and block people on skype/steam/whatever you're using.
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