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Rezzak [Troll Shadow Hunter] [Re-Submit]
#1
Player: Bitlordman

Character Full Name: Rezzak Gutripper

Character In-Game Name: Rezzak

Nickname(s): Rezzak'fon, Abomination

Association(s): Orgrimmar, The Darkspear Tribe

Race: Darkspear Troll

Class: Shadow Hunter (Warrior)

Age: 29

Sex: Male

Hair: Rezzak has no hair.

Eyes: Brown

Weight: 298 Pounds

Height: 7' 7

Appearance: He usually wears a full set of handcrafted clothes. Most of them are made out of bones and wood. His mask is the only valuable thing in his set. An axe on his back and a dagger tied up on his belt.

Other: Rezzak is not that tall but he is very muscular. He also has a scar on his left eye that is barely visible.

Skills and Abilites: Taught Rezzak is a shadow hunter he is capable of killing his enemies with melee weapons or with the aid of the Loa. He also has a great experience with daggers and axes. He also crafts weapons like axes, maces and swords.

Samedi is the Loa of cemeteries. With his aid Rezzak may attempt to smite an undead with one normal melee attack. If he accidentally smites a creature that is not undead, the smite has no effect.

Ogoun is another Loa god Rezzak learned from. It gives him the opportunity to cast dire curses that weaken the enemy or corrupt them with shadow magic.

And the last Loa god he knows is Dambala. With his aid, Rezzak can run swiftly like a serpent.



Alignment: Chaotic, Neutral

Personality: Rezzak is just a typical troll. Quiet and relaxed, but in some situations very aggressive and brutal. His voice is high and he talks loudly. His speech is usually clear. He would rather think logically than do something stupid. Rezzak is a shadow hunter, that usually spends time in Sen'jin village or Ogrimmar helping his fellow allies. He is a very careful person. When Rezzak is bored he usually spends his time helping somebody or just training to communicate with the Loa.

Despite of his brutality, Rezzak is more friendly and relaxed when he is surrounded by trolls rather than other races. In a emergency situation he would rather think first. Rezzak is not that calm and usually talks a lot. He is also a practical joker, and likes to do tricks on people just to make them mad. Despite this, he is very cruel and brutal with his enemies. Rezzak hates night elves. He avoids them a lot, and usually never talks to them. If he had the chance to kill an elf he would do it on the spot. There is no way that he can gain their trust.

Sometimes he may go alone in different areas just to relax or poke around for useful information. He also likes to take notes of the people he meets. He doesn’t like telling his name because he thinks that people can betray him. He only tells his name to trusted people. He also likes to command people. When he is excited it shows. He is also good at hunting. It doesn't really matter if it's an animal or a person. He doesn't like to drink that much. But for him food is very important. His favorite color is red.

The places he likes visiting most are Booty Bay and the Gurubashi arena. His goal in life is to succeed and become a well known Shadow Hunter among his people.

In combat situations, Rezzak is very patient and usually doesn't let the enemy strike first. He always tries hard to make the first hit. Rezzak also tries to find the target's weak spot, or in some situation blind him. He is brave and smart, and usually thinks his moves before he makes them.

History: Rezzak was born on the Darkspear Isles. He lived with his brother Krazzios and his father Kezzak. Unlike his brother he wanted to become a warrior. He was very young when he started to learn how to be one. He also tried his best to fight with axes better than anyone around the island. Rezzak really liked helping his father, but he was not that close with his brother. Rezzak and Krazzios usually always argued and fought for stupid and useless stuff. They were always tending to do stuff together but it was just not working out. Like any other troll Rezzak liked to hunt in the wilderness for raptors and tigers.

Over time Rezzak began to show skills in the tribe, and his father Kezzak was very proud of him. He learned to use axes very good. He often would spent time in home trying to make handcrafted axes or just help around the village. He was very useful to the Darkspear tribe, and his main job was to hunt animals for the village. Rezzak was very close with his father. His father Kezzak loved him for who he was and what he was doing.

When Thrall came to the Broken isles near the Maelstorm he made a peaceful contact with Sen’jin and the darkspear tribe. Soon Thrall and his men discovered that the humans were chasing them. This was the only chance that Rezzak could prove himself to the tribe so he went to help Thrall take out the humans. Thrall attacked and destroyed the humans with the aid of the Darkspear. Rezzak showed great success on the battle field as he killed many enemies, thought he almost killed himself. However, when the murlocs came they surprised both of the factions as they caught them off-guard. Thrall, along with Sen'jin, Rezzak, the Horde warriors, and the humans, were captured. They were taken in some sort of a cavern system, where they were locked. Rezzak was also locked with some of his allies and some human warriors. His fate seemed lost as he knew he wasn't going to make it out. But when Thrall started to fought his way out he started to look for his people as he breaked every cage his eyes cought. Rezzak was happy that Thrall came to his aid and showed respect to the trolls by freeing them. They fought their way out of the cave, but could not save Sen’jin since he was sacrified to the sea witch. Thrall went back to the village with his men. But when the sea witch revealed herself she started to attack every village the trolls had. Everything was going insane until the horde had no other choice but to leave the island and sail away to Kalimdor. Since then Rezzak lost his brother and father. His father Kezzak did not have the chance to go with Thrall as he was killed by the murlocs when the evacuation began. For his brother Krazzios, he had the luck to sail away to Kalimdor and shelter in one of the caves. But until this day Rezzak believes that one day he will find his family.

Under the new leadership of Vol’jin, the Darkspear swore allegiance to Thrall's Horde and followed him to Kalimdor. The trolls carved out another home for themselves this time among the Echo Isles on the eastern shores of the new orc kingdom. Rezzak helped with establishment with anything he could. Every day he was thinking about his family worrying about them. When the witch doctor Zalazane began using dark magic to take the minds of his fellow Darkspear, Rezzak panicked as he saw his people were starting to kill eachother, he was very confused as he tried to defend himself from the brainwashed trolls. Vol’jin had no other choice but to order an evacuation from the islands. Zalazane took control of the Echo Isles. The Darkspear have since settled on the nearby shore, naming their new village after their old leader, Sen'jin.

Rezzak took a various role as a warrior for the tribe. Every day he was hunting animals like boars, raptors and tigers. Despite of that he wanted to become more than just that. He wanted to use his warrior abilities and learn to make connections with the Loa. His dream was to become a shadow hunter. One day he decided to go to the Echo isles and spy on them. Rezzak was one of the good swimmers in the tribe so it wasn't a problem to him. He carefully swum to the shore of the Echo isles as he was very careful not to get spotted. Rezzak was shocked that so many trolls had been brainwashed to do Zalazane biding. He tried his best to gather enought information about Zalazane's plan as he spied on the trolls. He listened to their conversations taking notes of everything they were doing. When Rezzak returned to Sen'jin village he told everything he heard about them and from that day he learned what he was good at. Every day he started to improve in his job. Days later the tribe gave him a new job, because they saw that he could be useful for gathering information about Zalazane. Rezzak was very happy that the tribe accepted him for who he was. As he aged he became more mature and patient. But the hope in finding his family never went away.

Some years later, he became a well known warrior in his tribe. Every day he was training to become better, he helped the tribe in anyway, from hunting animals and killing enemies that threatened the tribe.

One day, Rezzak heard countless rumors that his brother might be still alive, and that he lived in Booty Bay. He started poking around, spying on people hearing new information until he came to the conclusion that he needed to look for his brother. He packed his stuff and said his goodbyes with the tribe as he went on his journey to find his brother Krazzios.

Rezzak spent countless months searching for his brother. He really believe he might find him. He was thinking on giving up and head back to his people again. Before that he met an old tauren in the Booty Bay inn. The great one explained to Rezzak that his brother fell in battle while trying to save his allies in Ashenvale. He did not believed the words, instead his anger started growing. The tauren told him to go in Ashenvale and find a black haired blood elf named Fleis. Rezzak had no other solution but to listen to his words. He knew the tauren wasn't lying so he ventured to the night elven land. After days of travelling all his savings went for the trip. Rezzak had no money left. The troll really hoped to find a solution and when he came to the land, he quickly started asking for the mysterious elf. The facts quickly started matching together. He found the elf making a grave for his brother near a small lake. Rezzak's mind flashed as he went closer to see the truth for himself. Fleis turned to Rezzak like he knew he was coming. The blood elf told everything to him. He thought it would be best for him to know the truth. The troll was clearly crushed by the news. His believes about his family flashed away. That day Rezzak thought about taking his life. But something inside told him to live. That same spark that hit him back when he was helping Thrall. It was the Loa. It was the spirits that cheered Rezzak and told him to live on. That's when he realised that he really had the powers to communicate with them. He spent his time there gathering money to return back to where he belongs. Back in Sen'jin village.

When the Cataclysm came to Azeroth everything changed for Rezzak. He spent most of his time on the Darkspear Isles learning how to become a Shadow Hunter. He was thought how to use the voodoo and how to share the passion of the ancient faith. Since he wasn't a skilled healer his powers blended on cursing his enemies, but he learned to how walk the line of the dark and light. He was taught to deal with the darker aspects of the spirit world. The connection between the Loa was also in training. He also started to learn how to communicate the Loa. And when the time came he learned to share and talk with the spirit world.

Time passed as his time went deeply into the arts of the voodoo and Loa. Rezzak finally learned the ways of the Shadow Hunter. Althought he was an adept his training never stopped and he always continued doing what he was desired. He did not leave his master until he fully learned how to deal with himself alone. He was making potions everyday, communicating with the Loa and learning how to fight. When the time came Rezzak wanted to leave the Darkspear Isles to improve his skills and travel around the world. Before he went on his journey he saw the cataclysm in his dreams that same night. He thought the Loa gave him a some sort of a sigh. Rezzak was surely known for his close believes in the Loa. He was a man of his word and he never left nothing undone. When the sun rose up Rezzak packed most of his important stuff in a bag and ventured into Azeroth led by the aid of the Loa.
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#2
Psst! Put Rezzak's name before "[Troll Shadow Hunter]" :B
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#3
The green text is the place thats been re-written and made for the future profile. Simply added stuff for the Shadow Hunter
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#4
I think I'm done with everything. I hope you give it a look :)
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#5
The abilities are not named after the loa, although this is minor. It is merely the loa who has taught the troll to do these things. Ogoun teaches you the spell hex, Dambala teaches the shadow hunter to transform him or herself into a serpent, thus the quick speed but I can understand if you do not believe the actual transformation into a snake would work.

There are many grammatical and a few spelling errors/typos throughout the profile, and I can help you with these if you'd like (just shoot me a PM.)

Thrall did not come to Sen'jin upon first contact with the orcs. He came to an island near the Maelstrom, these being the Darkspear Isles (believed to be the Broken Isles.) There was no human outpost; the humans chased after the orcs, who landed on the Darkspear Isle to take shelter from a heavy storm. The humans followed, and were defeated by the orcs and trolls. Sen'jin was not wounded by the murlocks, he was taken and sacrificed to the sea witch. Slightly different, but important!

I think there might be a slight misunderstanding here about how shadow hunters work, and what they are. A shadow hunter is generally far more a hunter than a warrior (many loa-granted abilities having been described by existing hunter abilities in-game.) But that is irrelevant, I think, as a warrior -can- be a shadow hunter, it is simply of a slightly different sort than expected.

My true concern here is thus: why is he in Zangarmarsh? The trolls have no connection to Outland, and while I can understand the mystical attraction to Zangarmarsh as a place of mystery... it seems very strange that he should be there. Especially in light of evidence that loa reside in the emerald dream.

Read this! It's a fantastic story written by Blizzard about Vol'jin and his path to shadow huntry. Much of the time it is a personal journey, not necessarily a traditional master-student relationship, which is what I get from your rendition.

Additionally, shadow hunters are highly respected in the troll community, and I do not know if they are reserved for special profiles. It may also be an interesting thought to give Rezzak some cause to travel, and see the world. Perhaps the loa want him to help deal with the apocalypse; it does seem like it would be important to them, and it would offer you more roleplay than being trapped in Sen'jin.
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  • Aethon, JVNemesis, JTJP770, Nikodemos
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#6
Covered up most of the mistakes. Made the history clear as possible from minor misunderstandings. I think I'm done.
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#7
Still filled with many grammatical errors that make it very hard to read. I would point out all of them but I just don't feel quite up to sifting through them all right now.
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#8
I think I covered the mistakes.
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#9
The post is done I hope somebody checks it out soon :)
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#10
You asked for it. :P

There's still a pretty large number of grammatical errors throughout this profile, unfortunately; I suggest you take Aphetoros up on that kind offer of his!

Quote: Berserking is his second game.

Is he a berserker as well?

Quote: He usually wears a full set of shadow clothes.

What are shadow clothes?

Quote: As a headmaster and a businessman he carries a lot of gold with him.

He’s a businessman and a shadow hunter? This is also never mentioned again. What's he a headmaster of? What business does he run?

You also say he likes to drink when he’s bored, but then say that he doesn’t like to drink much. Which one is it? :P

Quote: Rezzak'fon is born on the Darkspear Isles.

This is the only time I see this suffix added. Is it a mistake here, or is he an exile? It doesn't sound like it, based on the rest of the history.

Quote: Despite of that he wanted to become more than just that. He wanted to use his warrior abilities and learn to make connections with the Loa. He become a shadow hunter.

Grammatical issues aside for the moment, is this how he becomes a shadow hunter, just like that, or how he decides he wants to become one?

Also, what happened right at the end there before the green text? He goes to search for his brother in Booty Bay, and then suddenly he's back on the Darkspear Isles? Did he find his brother, give up...? It seemed super important to him, but then we're not given a resolution or any details on it.

I would also like to see this section here:

Quote: Until this day Rezzak could be seen roaming around the world in search of an adventure while seeking to further his faith in the Loa as well as the interests of his people. While he travels he wears a special ceremonial mask to cover most of his face and inspire fear in others.

rewritten in your own words, as it's pulled directly from the wiki with his name substituted. Touch on his motivations, his goals; it seems really abrupt to me that he decides to become a shadow hunter, and then everyone in his tribe recognizes him as a devout and respected follower of the Loa, even though right before this he was only a respected warrior. Flesh this out a bit more! Before it was all about his brother, without a mention of Loa-worship, and then his brother's immediately forgotten in favor of becoming a shadow hunter. Why the change? I'm interested!

Post when you've got some ideas.
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  • JTJP770
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#11
Done!
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#12
Quote: There's still a pretty large number of grammatical errors throughout this profile, unfortunately; I suggest you take Aphetoros up on that kind offer of his!

I'm going to echo this again, because just glancing through again I can still see all the issues I saw before. If not him or another person comfortable enough with English to help, I'll go through this at a later point and mark everything for you. I do suggest you take his offer, though; I'm sure it'd help you a lot!
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#13
Well I did covered the things you said up in the comments... I've read the post like 5 times... I dont quite see them.. :/ It would be good if someone throws the other errors.
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#14
I realize you don't see them, which is why Apheteros offered to help you find them!

Apheteros Wrote:I can help you with these if you'd like (just shoot me a PM.)

He offered to go through this with you and help correct the issues instead of just listing them and their corrections out, which is always a much better way of understanding the rights and wrongs of grammar. You learn by doing, not by copying out what someone else says!

If that doesn't work for you, like I said, I can go through later and list out everything for you, but I strongly encourage you to take the other option. I think it'll help!
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#15
Of course I want to learn... The main reasons why I'm here! I will try and find those mistakes.
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