Conquest of the Horde

Full Version: Ode to the Lost Minded.
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A simple book lays on the top of a bed. There is nothing special about it, it's not torn and is no where near elegant in any way. Never judge a book by it's cover.

Let us turn to the first page, and read the strange red ink.

Spoiler:
I've gotten a journal so that, in case it is my time to parish soon, someone will know the truth about me.

I broke my Fel addiction; I am no longer a warlock. The spells I once commanded I can no longer do. Good; I felt my mind clear at that moment. Ever moment of pain was worth it. There is so much to tell for my first entry; I do hope whoever finds this enjoys reading. I guess I can break it up into parts, first and foremost though.

I was attacked outside of Booty Bay yesterday by a ghoul known as Braindrinker, pet of Sanya. I'll tell about the attack as well as I can remember.

Read no more if you are weak of stomach.

He was in the middle of the path, chewing on something. I jumped off my mount and asked him who he was, then he spat out a finger. I forget exactly what he said before, but he looked at me oddly.

"I want a little taste."

Then he struck.

I was tackled to the ground and pinned. I tried to punch him, but all it did was knock his mask off. I switched arms to hit him with my left. He didn't dodge, he opened his mouth wide. I saw sharp, jagged teeth before he fit half my forearm in his mouth, and bit down.

I had never felt so much pain in my life.

I tried to scratch his face, it didn't work. He took offense and stuck his fingers into my right eye socket and pulled it out. I grabbed his arm to stop him, but the blood loss was taking its toll.

I had to make a choice: I let go of his arm and threw a punch at him. He jerked his hand back and took my eye with him. A lost eye, I could deal. That wasn't enough for him though. He let go of my arm but grabbed it right after. His free hand reached back and grabbed his giant red axe.

Time slowed.

It took ages for the axe to reach my arm, cleaving right though the bone. The pain was almost enough to make me pass out, but I was freed. I turn, and I ran. I heard him giggle like a child and run as well.

I didn't feel myself fall; I only saw black and my body hit the ground. I wasn't out though; I called the wolf to me, used my blood to make a sloppy message, and sent him off. Now I could only wait for death.
The wolf found Voran, thank the light. He didn't seem to really care that I was lying in my own blood missing an eye and part of an arm. It took him long enough, but he managed to heal me.

The rest of the day was rather dull until Naraith showed up and saw me. I find it odd how he cares so much about my physical health. We are kin in a way though, perhaps that is why. I hope he won't get in trouble for helping me.

I shall tell about more tomorrow, for now, I need rest.
This page is also written in a dark red ink.

Spoiler:
So, after all that, I was thrown into a cave in order to resist the temptation to cast fel, oh, and I was chained up. Aroes for some reason carries around blue chains.

I'm afraid to ask why.

I was put to sleep, but could still speak though my windstone. From this, I was able to understand something was being done to my body, and no one would tell me what. I disliked this greatly until Voran muttered something about it looking great. I was finally able to force myself awake.

I had an arm.

Of course, it was going to take a while to get used to it, or so I would let them think. You'd have to be silly to think me so weak I couldn' control a mana arm. I'll let them think I'm stupid though. Anna of course didn't visit until the end and would no doubt take full credit for something I forced upon myself.

So, the time passes, some mage named Eroci gave me herbs, on the same day the pain broke, and I felt the powers of the Mage return to me at least. Of course Voran wanted to celebrate...with drinking.

Why am I pretending to love him again?

As expected, he spent more time with the Keg than me. Un-needed Drama happened and my cover was blown to this other Sin'dorei mage, Uthanial. He figured it out when I had to be the adult and scold Anna for not being able to take care of her own problems.

What was the drama? Turns out this Sin'dorei mage has a liking for Anna, and made some unwanted moves. Anna of course has been stretching the story, leaving out facts, and sending people to talk to him rather than being brave enough to talk to him herself. So, I spoke with him, went to Anna, and told her to get it straight. The talk between the two went well, and Anna went to bed.

The male called me out, I didn't think he had heard! Ah well, it happens, I told him everything. Seems he wont run off and blab right this moment, but I must watch and wait.

I will kill him later, for now I must rest.
This entry is short and scribbled, as if she was excited as she wrote. It is written in normal black ink.

Spoiler:
Dael'ar is back. He came back for me!

My heart pounded when he first came into the bar with his pet, Lodur. There was a fight that involved my old blade. In the end the Ghoul got it, and I confronted Dael'ar, asking him if he really wanted me dead. Needless to say I was blown away from his response.

"I will be your blade, I will not allow you to suffer another scratch."

Does he care about me more than I expected? I would love that greatly. I've always been drawn to him. I broke my vow of not torturing for him, poor Lodur. How many people have had someone die so they could live? He did that for me.

I am spellbound by him.

These feelings in me confuse me, I know I am feeling this emotion known is common as 'Love'.

I do love him.

He kissed me in front of Voran. Good, I was annoyed with that weak little girl anyway. He acted all hurt. I took all I had not to laugh in his face. He was crying and everything!

I will kill him too.
This page is back to it's normal crimson ink

Spoiler:
The pain of being apart strikes again.

Dael'ar left soon after he dropped me off with the suggestion to stay in the tower until he returns. He will be back in three days at the most and one has already passed. I will stay in the tower as best I can, but I do so love to explore.

The Sin' dorei mage, Uthaniel, wanted to teach me a few things about being a mage, so we were to spar. I came at him with some of my power I can't let him think I'm that strong least he sees me as a threat. In the end, he gave me his blade to replace the one Lodur now had.

Voran kept being a little girl about the whole thing, acting like he was the one who had to let it all go and split us. I'll give him that closure, let him think I'm the one who is hurt. In reality, it's taken all my will power to not dance around in joy now that he's off my back. I feel sorry for any woman he goes after, or man, Voran does seem the type.

Never mind that, I doubt he'll live that long. If he keeps on as is, Dael'ar might not like that. I hear a commotion outside...


There is a break, and then it goes on, more of a scribble than before.

He came back! I wasn't excepting him until tomorrow but he came back! Uthaniel was teaching this weak little human called Redis how to spar as well. Said human should be put out of his misery. It was my turn, and during the middle, Dael'ar returned. One of the mage's attacks hit him, so Dael'ar punched him. The little baby mage ran into the tower about being attacked.

Pathetic.

Dael'ar and I spoke for a while, and then we went to Annabelle. He has joined us for a short time to ride the world of the circus threat, and will stay in the area of the tower. He doesn't want me to leave, he wants me in his sight. I was nervous, and I told him...

I told him I love him.

He said he was pleased, but had no real reaction. He told me to go to the tower to sleep, much to my protest. I will listen to him, but not give in!

That mage, Redis. He seems to be a problem, and weak.

The weak cannot live.
This entry is in black ink, and rather sloppy.

Spoiler:
Currently I am recovering from a nasty shoulder wound. Sorry if this may seem short…though I guess I owe you an explanation as to what happened.

I decided to disobey everyone today and head on over to Booty Bay. Traveling is much faster as a mage, though scares me slightly. I sat around, found out some unpleasant things about Voran. Apparently he wants no mention of me.

Silly priest, you will die.

Wilhelm touched me…I dislike it greatly. He honestly thinks he has a chance with me, it's pretty sad. Like I'd soil my body with his filth. He is persistent, and clearly a cheater. I mean come on, he has a woman already…she is much more beautiful than I.

Humans are weird.

Then Kitten came…Oh..that's right! You don't know kitten yet. Well…let me explain. He is a very large Sin'dorei male with gray skin…and striking red hair. I do adore his hair, shame he hides it under this ugly helmet. Anyway, he is also a death knight, a walking corpse. Kitten has no emotions…but the thought of causing pain does something to him. He teaches people to take pleasure in pain, in return, he gets to cause pain.

I am his “pet”.

He protects me so long as I allow him to hurt me. You may find this odd…but who knew pain could hurt so good? He teaches me to ignore the pain…it helps me last longer in battle as I can ignore it for the most part. The downside is that he is rather possessive, tried to chain me up to stop me from leaving his sight. His other pet was there, laughing at me.

Anyway, he and I sparred, but he hit me rather hard with his blade…nearly took my arm off again. I was knocked out…but I had a strong feeling of danger. I have no idea how long I was out, but when I woke up, Kitten was carrying me. I was going to apologize for being a weak fight, but he interrupted me.

“You're safe now, don't worry.”

I apologized already and allowed myself to rest. Whatever the danger was, Kitten kept me safe, just as he promised me so many times. He took me to the Inn with this girl who looked kinda like me, and told me to sleep. He's outside talking with the girl, and I'm writing this. Now I tire, and I shall sleep.

Kitten will keep me safe.
This entry is a mixture of the black and red ink. It begins in red, but ends in black.

Spoiler:
I am glad I am no longer a warlock.

Allow me to elaborate. A Sin'dorei warlock came into the crater on top of a felsteed. Why the guards didn't kill him then is beyond me. He made it all the way to the arena bar before I challenged him to a duel. Got yelled at by some stupid Orc who said arcane wasn't allowed. Ah well…they need to make these things known better.

So, this warlock decides he isn't done being an idiot. He carved a friggin demonic rune on a table and summoned an Imp! In the middle of a bar…full of fel-haters! How stupid can one person be? Well…he didn't last very long. A female Orc took off his head, poor guy didn't even have a chance to fight back. She took his body and head and ran off to visit her aunt, from what I understood.

Stupid Warlock.

Aiga, a dwarf, seems to have taken a liking to me… brining me gifts all the time. This time she got me a hat just like hers…the other time a rifle and a flintlock. I'm not good with guns though…I think I'll stick with magic. She was being a harpy about how I wore a robe…then made the mistake of making fun of this Kaldorei. Some male dwarf jumped to her defense and fought off the tree-humper in an arena battle. The dwarf won…Aiga was cheering him on the whole way.

They'd look cute together.

Said Kaldorei is a sore loser though and spat blood on her face. Shame…not like I had any respect for that race anyway. Wilhelm wanted to talk after it was all over…such a prying jerk. I found out who he was working for…this is too good. Should something go wrong…I now have somebody to blame, wonderful! I have him set up as well. If he speaks my plan, no one will believe him, and I will know if he betrays me.

I feel giddy.

Kitten found his other pet, seems she was caught by a slaver…such a weak little girl. Shamefully the slaver didn't kill her. An infection was causing some serious issue, but it was healed. I am writing this again with Kitten outside, keeping us safe. He'd be upset if he knew I was awake…and I think I hear his footsteps.

I must sleep, farewell.
This page is back to the normal red ink, or something red at least.

Spoiler:
There is really nothing much to day about today. Fel it was dull! Everyone it seems is in Westfall with Annabelle…of course –I- wasn't invited to go. Oh well, the tower is all mine I guess.

Even my time with Dael'ar was short.

He was in Booty Bay with Lodur, attempting to teach the Ghoul basic words in order for it to communicate. I came in to see some…Forsaken girl making moves at him! It took all I had not to set her on fire with pure will alone! I don't think I've been that angry in such a long time.

Dael'ar is MINE!

He saw me and said he wanted to get away from the city, I was glad to follow. If I had stayed…I would have killed that woman. He froze the water around us and we walked around the bay to our island. It's a small thing with three trees that I like to sit in. Nothing special really, but it seems to be our spot when we wish to be alone. We spoke for a little bit about something…I forget. Then he pulled me close, arm around my shoulder and set his head against mine.

I've never been so happy.

He said this…Ebon blade would be laughing at him if they saw that…or might kill them. They could try…but I doubt I'd let them harm him at all. I did remind him that I would die of age long before him, if that is what causes it. He said he would make sure I reached that point….so sweet of him!

But I worry watching me pass will hurt him.

Perhaps there is a way to extend my life to match his, so he will never have to be alone. Maybe there is still a way to become a Death Knight…or a spell that will extend my life. Ah well…something to study later. He left not long after, always so busy that one is.

I will sleep on the island tonight in hopes he will return while I am there. Beds are overrated anyway. I've spoiled myself being in these cities…eating food, using beds. Bah, in the wilds I ate things bloody and slept on the ground. I miss those days…everything was so simple then.

That Forsaken will die if I see her around Dael'ar again.
This page is wet, the words run but are readable, and are in the normal red ink. One can almost guess this is her remembering her life.

Spoiler:
I wish for death…

So long ago, near this time, I had come out of the wilds near a fishing village. It was only a week after I had left Silvermoon, so I was still a foolish little girl. I trusted them, but did not tell them I was a Warlock. I was accepted as the apprentice to a tailor, thus began my work.

I was pretty then, not scarred like I am now, so I attracted the attention of several young men. Most gave up rather easily, or just weren't a Sin'dorei.

I'd never settle with a human.

One of them would not give up. Day after day he would visit me, bringing me something small like a flower, or a small pretty stone. He was a handsome Sin'dorei, long blond hair, tan skinned, lovely eyes. Needless to say I fell fast to his affections.

We were soon engaged.

I was excited, and knew the first thing I must do is give up the Fel, leave the art of being a Warlock behind! So, I summoned my Imp one last time and told him never to tempt me, I was done. But…little did I know…my lover saw.

I came back to the village the next day, ready to prepare for what I was sure to be an amazing wedding with the man I loved so dearly. Ready to take on his surname, as I had none of my own. But when I got there…

He was waiting.

The pain was unbearable, I was greeted with an arrow though my chest. I pleaded with him, asking him why he was doing this to me. He threw me out of the hut where the other villagers waited. His words burned me.

“Warlock scum! Die!”

I ran as fast as I could, my heart was broken. But it turned to anger. That night, while they grew fat on food and stupid on mead, I struck. I watched the village as it burned. Some ran into the fire and died, the ones that got away I and my Imp were quick to take care of. Some got away still, but they didn't matter.

He did.

He was there, waiting. He knew what was going to happen. He knew the rules when dealing with me. As I drew his soul from his body, he stared up at me and spoke.

“Death will forever follow you, love. You are a death strider.” He then died.

Death strider…he was right about me. Years after this remained to be true. Whomever I tried to care for died. The curse would follow me forever. Death…Talah. It followed me. Strider…malanore, also meaning outcast. I carried his soul for a long time before shoving it into a demon for torment.

Reigen…Talah'malanore.

I took his name in the end.
This page is neatly written, no mistakes can be seen in the flow of handwriting. Whomever wrote this took a long time to keep the handwriting neat and clean.

Spoiler:
Humans are filth.

Why did I ever like these sacks of meat? What was I thinking? They give in so easy to the cries of another, and think they rule everything. Ha! Autumn will fall, as will anything run by humans. They will be wiped off the earth, and I will laugh and bathe in their blood!

But first.

Dael'ar returned to me today, I was stuck somewhere. He forgives me, though I know I am far from deserving. He came to me to save me again…on the back on a flying bone thing. Oh well…he still cares, and I have my love back! But..at the same time…

I feel different.

I no longer feel like myself, perhaps it is because I have accepted what I am. I am a tool to be used by others. My will is pointless, and I will learn to avoid hurt by accepting this little fact. Dael'ar is much happier with me when I obey…as is Kitten. Perhaps my role is life is to serve…perhaps that is what I shall do. Dael'ar is the only one who makes me feel like a person anyone.

I am his.

I no longer feel the need to protect Annabelle…why waste my time? Yet at the same time, I cannot bring myself to leave her side…why is this? What kind of spell has she cast on me…I will break it! Dael…return to me soon so I may forever leave this place beind.

I have a student now as well, Merry. I hope her I can teach her will. I hope she never gives in like me. I am weak, but I will train her to hold her will above all others. She is more important than anyone else. No one will top her, not her friends, lovers, family, no one!

I will train her like I would my own child.

Annabelle is suffering right in front of my eyes. She is reaching for things and being sat on by two Sin'dorei males: Uthaniel and Voran. Poor girl. She is crying and moving in pain from an unknown source, possibly a curse. The others around her are too busy worrying.

I no longer care.
This page is in it's off red ink, but random spots upon it are water stained.

Spoiler:
I recall my first six murders.

It is a memory that haunts me forever, and will keep doing so until the end of my life. It gives me night terrors; I wake up in cold sweat at night, the screams still piercing my ears. It makes me wonder…what awaits me when I die. Will it be the embrace of a family, or the eternal torment of their screams?

Allow me to tell you of the start of my taint.

I was excited, coming back from this war; I sat on the wagon and spoke with the mages. I was no longer one, after all, I was better. My fire was stronger; my Imp could come up from behind and attack my target. Of course, no one saw the imp. I was better, I was stronger, I lasted longer.

I was a Warlock.

My family would be so proud of me, I have become what they had been looking for! The wagon stopped at my village, I got off and grabbed my stuff. It was going to be a joyful reunion. I paid no attention to the doctor that walked by with a child, to return to Silvermoon. I came in and saw my mother lying down, weak from childbirth. That explained the doctor I saw. I wasted no time, wanting to expand the good news!

They threw me out.

I ran from them, my own brothers chased me out with their blades. I…hurt so badly. I ran, crying, sobbing, into the woods. I was able to lose them once it started to rain. Bless the rain. I spent hours in the forest on my knees, crying and screaming. I wanted to die. Unknowingly, I summoned an Imp.

He tempted me.

My mind left me at that time, I only knew hate. That night, I came back into the small home. Mother was weak, and the others were drunk from celebrating. I screamed at them, demanding them to tell me why they kicked me out. They screamed back, calling me all sorts of names. They called me the pet of an Orc, traitor, and filth. The Imp was behind me…he urged me on.

There was a flash of purple.

There were screams.

Then nothing.

Six bodies lay in the house. All breathing, but they would never wake up. I picked up the purple shards that were located next to each body. I knew what I had done, it was an accident, I didn't mean to!

My youngest sibling most likely lives on, I pity him or her. I ruined its life. It will never know the love of a real family; no one would lie to it. Will it grow to track me for revenge? I would deserve no less. I only hope it is prepared to face me; I will not go down without a fight. I am still tainted to this day.

My first six murders were my family.
Again, this page is written in red.

Spoiler:
We are all insane.

Deep down, admit it to yourself. You might think yourself normal, but this is far from true Take a deep breath and close your eyes, let your deepest thoughts flow free.

Do you hear it?

The call to be wild. We all have it deep within ourselves. Some of us listen to it, follow it and live how we were meant to live. Others deny this. They live in luxury, spoiling themselves on soft beds, cooked food and wine. When the time comes to fight, they will be the first to die.

Will you heed the call?

Listen to it, to the whispers that are deep inside of your mind. What do they tell you? Kill your enemies…breed to pass on your greatness, cover yourself in blood. Each voice in each person is never the same. They only talk to those who wish to listen. Most everyone just shoves the voices to the back of their mind, only to forget about them later.

The young listen. Why do you think they all like to run off into the woods, despite your fearful calls? The voice calls to them, tells them to run free and wild! They wish for no silly boundaries such as clothing, walls and beds.

I tried to deny them.

I was miserable, stuck in the walls of Silvermoon. Men ran around flaunting their money to impress the weak women. They drank and concerned themselves over appearance and social standings. I could take no more after I murdered my family.

I listen to the whispers.

The men that I like are in armor, warriors. They come home in blood, they are rouge and could defend themselves and me should the time call. I am a warrior. I do not stand back and run, I love the trill of danger. I would rather kill for my food than buy, not a day goes by where I miss the wilds. The sight of the person below me screaming in pain, the light leaving their eyes…

I am one of the lost minded.

Spoiler:
(Not the best at poetry, oh well!)

To the lost minded,
We are never alone
We will rise up together
And take the world by storm.

To the lost minded,
Wandering though the woods
Move alone no longer
March with your brothers

To the lost minded
Hung in your cells
Sing loud in your voice
Freedom will be yours.

To the lost minded,
Cowering in the shadow
Rise up and stand proud
Smirk as we rise and others fall.

To the lost minded,
Covered in someone's blood
Drink to your hearts content
No one will find us.

To the lost minded,
My brothers and sisters
Draw out your weapons
Help me beat them down.

To the lost minded,
The whispers in our heads
No longer should you care
Sanity is overrated.
Spoiler:
Yet again I am without a right eye.

Oh well, at least that stupid human mage cannot track me. I am beyond their reach now, as I'm not stupid enough to travel in their areas. No longer will my mind be tormented with the whiny voices about how everything is so unfair, death is wrong, WEAKLINGS!

All of my planning paid off at long last. Sagi is free from the Autumns grasp! I was sadly not there during the fighting, having being injured the night before. By the time I got there, Sagi was demanding his staff and hat. Who was I to deny him? I summoned them back and presented them…and was sucked into ANOTHER portal thing.

I don't know where I landed, but I was alone and rather afraid. I had hoped my darling Dael'ar would come to me again, but instead it was some arrogant Kaldorei. Iz is what they called her, had a rather large bloodthirst it seems. Soon after Nar and some gnome came, and attracted the attention of some giant thing.

We ran like crazy.

I can't remember when I had such fun, I played the scared fool for Nar's benefit though, I hear human men like to feel as if they are protecting something. Well, they got into a fight with something a little too big and I fled…only to land on my arse after being summoned. We then departed to the mage city.

Wonder what happened to the space goat…

So here I am, Sagi says he owes me…so hopefully I will be welcomed in. I wish to belong, and with how much fun I had today being “Evil”, I hope it is with them. Dael'ar will like it better I think…I never fit in with the Autumns. Uth came in and had no idea what was going on…I hope it's a while before the figure it out.

I feel tired, so I will stay in a room in this Inn. A shame Dael'ar is not with me, I could use some sort of real comfort right now…then again. I do have one; it will take a long time. Four seasons should be narrowed down to three.

I will rid this world of taint…. starting with autumn.

For the lost minded!
Spoiler:
I do not belong in this world.

My ideals are too advanced, something these fools cannot grasp. They all wish for fighting while crying to peace. Don't they understand? If they want to live in peace, the taint in this world must be destroyed! This taint is something I call misunderstanding. If we all just accepted the differences in views, less death would happen!

The Autumns refuse to see outside their blind eyes.

They are a taint, a large one. So is this…Alliance army. What are they protecting? The right to murder whomever they feel goes against their view? That makes them worse than us so called evil ones. The so-called justice they use is just a twisted version of their own wants.

They will cause the world to die.

I got into another fight with Dael'ar, this one broke my heart again. He is trying to tell me whom I can and cannot talk with. I stormed out of course and Naraith followed. I tried to fly away, but he stole a mount and followed me. We spoke for a little bit and he tried to convince me Dael did not love me. I know he does, that's why he cares so much.

After a long day, he finally decided to go back to the mage city. He flew off; Naraith did, and expected me to follow no doubt. As he went out of my sight, I smiled and shook my head. I'm sure one day he will understand. I doubt he will miss me much anyway, human's lose attention on another person rather fast. I could only say one thing as he left my sight.

“Goodbye, my friend.”

I have much thinking to do, and not much time to do it in. Sooner or later the Autumns will strike back and I will be needed, or perhaps Dael'ar will search for me and bring me back. Perhaps on this journey of mine I will find a place to call home. I will stop by the city every now and then for supplies and rest…but not for long.

For the lost minded.

Reigen Talah'malanore.
Spoiler:
This is most odd.

I went into hiding, a good idea on my part as Sagi did suggest lying low. How much lower can I get than a wasteland with hardly any life at all in it besides very…very angry creatures? The air outside this…pink bubble is dangerous so I'm told…I can't be in it for very long else I might die.

Welcome to the Neatherstorm.

I am in some...dome thing. I do not understand how it works at all, but it allows plants to grow and water to stay connected to the ground. There are three of them around so I'm told, not sure which one I'm in exactly. Not like it really matters. I miss my Dael'ar…I may have to sneak out to get to him again…no one will really notice. I tend to get “lost” while exploring areas anyway.

I'm such a bad girl.

Coming here was Kitten's idea; he's so worried about me getting hurt. Well…not worried I guess. Can the guy even feel anything? I don't know…I'll call it worry for lack of better explanation. Some priest came with us…Amelia. Kitten wants us to get along…we shall see. I feel odd with her here…why should she join me in any self-inflicted exile?

She is not the one in danger.

Yet she puts herself in danger is she stays around me…as does Kitten. I can't understand why they do this. Kitten can always get another pet…not like he doesn't have plenty of them. This girl hardly even knows me…why does she –care-? I am…so confused.

I'm losing my grip on this world.

Every day that goes by, I feel less and less to others. The lines between friends and enemies are blurring, sometimes even fading away. I feel the same…contempt for most everyone. A numb feeling to meeting someone new to where I act as I normally do.

What is happening?

At least I still feel my love to Dael'ar, this is as strong as ever. Nothing can break the bond I have with him, not even death. I am truly spellbound by him and I wish to stay that way. At least around him I can feel like myself, I feel mortal and normal. But lately the fights between us…

Who am I?
Spoiler:
Who am I?

It's a question that has haunted me from my last entry in you, dear journal. Any who read this no doubt think I'm silly, or just stupid. It should be simple, I should just be able to say: “I am Reigen Talah'malanore, lover of Dael'ar, whom is a Death Knight while I myself am a mage.” While all this is true…it's not that simple.

What is happening to me?

I remember when I was a mage…before my taint as a warlock. I was carefree and high organized. Nothing that happened to me was unplanned. I had a time and a place scheduled to each and every thing I did. Granted, it left me with few friends. I was proud of my home and quick to show my love for my people at all times.

When did all that die?

As a warlock, I hated the people of Silvermoon, calling them horrible things for what I thought was their fault. Really, I hated everyone that was not me or my demons. No longer was I carefree…no longer was I organized. Everything that happened was spur of the moment. I was wild, my hair a mess and I began to lose my weight, to the point of my bones showing.

I have yet to regain my weight back.

Now here I am, a mage again, with only one full arm. I still consider myself tainted, it is something that will never leave me, and will only try to draw me back in the end. But now…I am conflicted on everything. Which am I? Am I Reigen of Silvermoon, or Reigen of the Wilds?

Or am I neither?

My morals…my values…are all being tested. I feel filthy, yet justified, strong yet weak. My brain says right while my heart says left. What am I supposed to do? What I did to the Autumns is…unforgivable, yet…I miss them so. What happened to my hate? All this time to think…they were my friends…but so are some of the circus. But…after that, the only one who spoke to me was Naraith and Wilhelm. The rest don't care. But…no….please no…

What have I done?

Please…someone…. send me to the abyss where I belong! I am a monster…a betrayer! Free me…someone…please, before it takes hold of me again, before my insanity wins, HEL-

The ink after that is dragged off the page, as if it was forced away.
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