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Harun Sunsong (Blood Elf Spellbreaker)
#16
That was my mistake for generalizing too much (though I always sorta saw Silvermoon as a militarised police force due to the Blood Knights and all but that's not here or there). I'll fix it to be consistent soon.
Your stories will always remain...
[Image: nIapRMV.png?1]
... as will your valiant hearts.
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#17
Ok!

Here's what I did: Harun was a captain in the army, but since the Third War he's reassigned himself to the city guard. He holds no rank in the guard itself, his military rank is moreso something to be respected than anything else. That work? C:
Your stories will always remain...
[Image: nIapRMV.png?1]
... as will your valiant hearts.
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#18
Quote:Class: Spell Breaker

We need your OOC class as well. If you want it to be worded as Spell Breaker, then you should format it as:

Class: [[Insert name of OOC Class|Spell Breaker]]

Quote:In the years following, Harun has kept to his homeland to protect it from dangers. He still proved a popular and outgoing individual, though the constant tragedies that have effected his homeland has jaded him somewhat, hiding it behind a strong face and a crooked grin.

I'm fine with the other use of the word popular in the profile, since it only pertains to people who are a little closer to him, but him being a generally popular person comes off as a little too special. It's alright to say your character is charismatic: he has formatted his personality so that he has the potential to gain the devotion of others, but using the word 'popular' without any specificity connotates that he already has a general devotion from the populace.

Quote:However, the alliance with the Horde has pressured him to remain in Quel'thalas primarily, wanting nothing to do with orcs and ESPECIALLY nothing to do with the trolls.

No need for the use of all-caps here. The word especially is in and of itself a word that's meant for emphasis - it does its job without all-caps.
[Image: anim_500.gif]
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  • Ural
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#19
Fix'd, fix'd, aaaand fix'd!
Your stories will always remain...
[Image: nIapRMV.png?1]
... as will your valiant hearts.
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#20
I'll go ahead and slap my half of the approval on this.

[1/2]
[Image: anim_500.gif]
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  • CappnRob
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#21
Quote:Here's what I did: Harun was a captain in the army, but since the Third War he's reassigned himself to the city guard. He holds no rank in the guard itself

Just one more clarification, sorry. He's in the guard, but has no rank in it. You still want him to be a guard though, right? Because that means he still holds some kind of rank in it, if not his captain one. Did you just mean he isn't a guard captain?
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#22
That was just me flubbing my words again. He isn't a guard captain, just a regular guard, pft. Captain was his army rank.
Your stories will always remain...
[Image: nIapRMV.png?1]
... as will your valiant hearts.
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#23
2/2
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#24
More Sunsongs...more Sunsongs!
[-] The following 1 user Likes Erynn's post:
  • CappnRob
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#25
Wikified!
[Image: anim_500.gif]
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