[-]
Main Menu
Portal
Forums
Wiki
Rules
FAQs
Events Calendar
Downloads

[-]
Latest Threads
Where Are You Now?
Last Post: Sourpuddle
08-26-2020 08:16 AM
» Replies: 15
» Views: 406
What is glistening
Last Post: Xigo
08-17-2020 10:19 AM
» Replies: 9
» Views: 2982
You are a fond memory. Good night, CoTH...
Last Post: CappnRob
05-01-2020 08:05 PM
» Replies: 32
» Views: 85976
You Can't Go Home Again
Last Post: Scout
03-15-2019 09:24 PM
» Replies: 0
» Views: 2554
"Years of Service" Awards
Last Post: Maulbane
05-26-2018 09:58 PM
» Replies: 100
» Views: 3418

[-]
Who's Online
There are currently no members online.

[-]
Google AdStuff

Linaria [Human death knight bard]
#1
Player: Stealthscout.

Character Full Name: Linaria Oakson.

Character In-Game Name: Linaria

Nickname(s): Lin, Aria.

Association(s): Knights of the ebon blade, The alliance.

Race: Human.

Class: Death knight.

Age: 55 years..

Sex: Female.

Hair: Grey.

Eyes: Runic blue.

Weight: 175 lbs.

Height: 5'7.

Skills and abilities:
Music: Linaria is a bard, a dead one now, but when she was alive she trained since she was young in singing and playing the guitar, after she died she learnt how to use the horn of winter, so she adds it to her playing instruments.

Death knight training: While being controlled by the lich king, she learnt the path of frost, becoming cold to the touch, able to seep the heat off almost everything.

Usual Garments/Armor: Linaria walks with her plated armor and a big ebon blade sword on her back, along with a horn hanging on near her waist by a leather string and a guitar on her back.

Personality: Is the exact opposite of what she been like when she was human, Cold hearted, silent and anti-social, she prefers the quiet than being in a bar full of people, but one thing kept, what keeps her human, her passion to music, she will always love it, and smile when she plays, she doesn't care when she plays, where she plays, and how she plays, she loves it, and will always do it.

History: Linaria, was born at the in big city of Lordaeron, the capital of the humans, she grew in good conditions and though her childhood she always liked sitting near the theater to hear music, or the backround music of acts, she had passion in her eyes, being friendly and helpful to all she sees. After hearing all those concerts she slowly developed musical hearing, and asked her parents to pay for music lessons, they agreed and she was sent to musical lesson, learning how to sing and play the guitar.

As her teenage days came she was already a skilled player, playing for her amusement most of the time, or for her friends, she wrote her first song at the age of sixteen, her life didn't go differently from any teenager, she had her ups and downs, her loves and failures.

She became an adult and wrote all kinds of tunes and songs, she decided to leave home and start traveling at the kingdom of Lordaeron, playing music for all who passes, she believed music should be free, and not paid for, because it could warm someone's heart, and you should not charge for happiness.

As the first war came, she sang in bars and public areas to make people less stressed from the war, to bring hope to their hearts.

As she was singing on one of her travels, she met a man, and fell in love with him, he was a simple soldier, but she saw more in him, after a couple of years they married, and she was the happiest woman, she wrote songs for him, and songs about him.

The birth of her daughter was a great happiness to the couple. She took care of her and loved her, she also played songs for her. Raising her into the family, she taught her the basic knowledge of the world, like history and such, because she believed she must choose her own path and to do that she must know a little from everything. Her daughter liked history more than music, Linaria didn't take that personally, after all, she believed that daughter should go where she wants too.

The second war came, and he was called away, she wrote a song on how she missed him and took care of her daughter. While taking care of her daughter she continued to play songs for the people, the war ended and he came back, she was happy he didn't die.

The third war came, and her daughter left to hillsbard, Linaria refused and kept singing and waiting for her husband to return, he never did, and the only glimps she last saw, was her guitar shattering, and hear head hitting the cold, hard floor.

She opened her eyes, and was at the Acherus, enslaved, she was trained in using the sword and the path of the cold, she became emotionless, and did everything she was told to do, sent to fight in the frontlines at lights hope she found herself fighting, against her husband, at that moment, when she struck him, and killed him, a cord went through her, all her memories came back, and she began crying, but she didn't know what made it happen, because her feelings were so suppressed.

She joined the ebon blade on their fight against the lich king, she fought where she was put in and she met Lisella a Blood elf death knight, she liked her, and befriended her, they both fought together until they ended the existence of the lich king, she decided she would travel with Lisella and along her travels she wasted all of her money on purchasing a guitar, her lover to it was the only thing that made her feel human again when she clearly wasn't, she is now traveling with Lisella to wherever she leads her too, singing her songs, and enjoying her death to the limit.
PM
Reply
#2
Quote: to the hillsbard
To Hillsbrad.

Quote:didn't know what made it, happen,
made it happen.

Quote: she stroke him,
She struck him.

Also, your first lines are too spaced out. Just leave a single blank row between sections, rather than two.

At's about it.
[Image: 2hhkp3k.gif]
Recommended reads: Divine and Arcane. Also, elves.
Wanna refer me in Tribes: Ascend? Clickies!
PM
Reply
#3
Fixed everything! thanks for pointing the problems out!
To be honest, when I copy paste word stuff to here, it ignores the space between paragraphs, so I make some spaces -juusssttt- in case.
PM
Reply
#4
I'd like to note that there's no need to specify that your character is a bard if she's just a normal singer or musician. :P

A helpful hint for future profiles; Keep your prepositions in mind. "was born at the big city of Lordaeron", "she grew good conditions" and so forth. That should be "in" in both cases. It's something she's surrounded by. At means it's somewhere she's on/at, but not necessarily closed off in. "On the docks", "at the party", "in the car".

The rule about "the" should be observed, too! "In school", "at the mall". Acherus is a proper noun. "I live in the England" would sound odd, wouldn't it? :)

Overall, looks good. I'd like to hear more about her daughter and husband, though! The mention of a daughter is really vague, to be honest. It doesn't seem like she was ever important.

... So, initial it is. :P

P.S. I don't mean to read anything wrong, but I found "she wrote songs on him" hilarious. /ifyouknowwhatImean
[Image: 6RpTZgI.gif]
PM
Reply
#5
Obby.
And that what happens when you fast type your profiles and you get those kind of errors, I never slow down :P always on the rush, so I get problems like that! :P
Uhh.. more about her daughter huh...? I just added her... because.. Fine then, I will expand.

Expanded and fixed by the way! thanks! :D
PM
Reply
#6
Initial approval! (Delayed, because I forgot earlier.)
[Image: 6RpTZgI.gif]
[-] The following 1 user Likes Rowgen's post:
  • Stealthscout
PM
Reply
#7
Changed the birth of her daughter, and fixed a few errors.
PM
Reply
#8
The section about her daughter has some small errors. Specifically, the beginning of the sentence needs capitalized and there is either an unnecessary page break or there needs to be a line between the two. I have to go to work now or I would post the quote. You'll see what I mean when you review it.
[Image: stonetalon-mountains.jpg?w=760]
PM
Reply
#9
Oh my, it's word acting up again! fixed! :D
PM
Reply
#10
There's still a couple of structural oddities, but with the way your English has been improving/been picked already in this thread, I think we can hold off on it for now.

Approved!
PM
Reply
#11
Wikified!
PM
Reply


Possibly Related Threads…
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Folion [Draenei Death Knight] Gunnash 9 967 01-15-2015, 12:28 PM
Last Post: Geoni
  Ysabelle Ventris [Human Knight-Champion/Warrior] Ukarai 5 169 01-01-2015, 05:30 PM
Last Post: Geoni
  Lak'tuk [Orc Death Knight] Snuggley 9 863 12-11-2014, 05:34 AM
Last Post: Dilly
  Joz'luz'fon [Drakkari Death Knight] Kira13 10 316 09-15-2014, 01:36 PM
Last Post: Ural
  Gurgand (Death Knight) Wujen 4 284 08-30-2014, 10:57 AM
Last Post: Geoni



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)

youth-backhand
This forum uses Lukasz Tkacz MyBB addons.