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Ray Shadowcrest [Worgen]
#1
Player: Dug

Character Full Name: Ray Shadowcrest

Character In-Game Name: Ray

Association(s): Ebon Blade

Race: Worgen

Class: Unholy Death Knight

Age: 10226

Sex: Male

Hair: Black

Eyes: Glowing Blue

Weight: 135 kg

Height: 7'8 feet / 2.37 m (Scale 1.15)

Usual Garments/Armor: Unholy green armor made of saronite, a full set no doubt. He also has a runic blade with a runic enchant of spellshattering. The blade it self is green.

Alignment: Neutral

Personality: Ray is a rather calm and collected death knight, indifferent yet decisive in what he wishes to do. He rarely speaks unless he has to explain things in detail - he picks his words carefully and prefers to observe what others do or say. However as all death knights his nature strives him to kill. In such times during observation he may be merely waiting for prey so he may strike and do as he must lest he succumbs to madness. One may find him clueless on what to do as he wanders the world sedating his hunger and exploring. He is unlikely to venture into places which are not accustomed to death knights, which is many of the places in the world. With that said it is unlikely to see him in Stormwind and other capitals. This one has no other garments to wear beside his armor nor does he intend to change.

One may find Ray hating upon those who judge others, as often, there is a lot of judgment passed along to death knights and worgen. Him being both of those, it is rather uncomfortable for him. In the end, it truly does not matter as he avoids those kind of people. If he does not like a place or a person, or a group of people, he merely walks away without a word. He will keep on wandering until he finds somewhere he can enjoy. He always pondered the idea if he had a proper name, a mother or father even. A part of him wanted to know if he ever had a family but he kept it all secret. He hid his questions and his curiosity behind his bestial form, his unholy aura and the saronite armor. Keeping himself unapproachable. Often when he comes across other death knights, with one glare and one word from them he would try to summarize them. As if wondering if they will be wasting his time or not. In fact, he would do this with all the people he comes across. He barely has any patience for those he dislikes and often just walks away.

History:

Ray Shadowcrest, originally called Enranlaen Woodrage, was a night elf born in north parts of Kalimdor, Ashenvale. As a child when he was just growing up he knew he wanted to be a druid, to be in tune with the nature. Animals woke great interest within him and it was only an eventual development. Soon enough a shando took him in as his apprentice; Enranlaen would study the druidic ways with great passion and enthusiasm. His shando was his father, yet another druid by the name of Naellan. While his mother Lyleaith was a sentinel she indeed approved of this. As time went on he would learn his first spells and would eventually learn how to transform into shapes of an animal, the first being the bear. Learning a form takes time and it sure did for young Enranlaen at the time. Through years of constant practice he would master the form of the bear only to look at the sky and notice the birds who fly and see all from above.

It is often he would wish to take off to the skies and fly away as do the birds which he admired. His wish to master the ways of shapeshifting into a bird eventually came true, again he would intensely practice and study. He worked closely with his father and other druids to do such. Upon mastering the ways of the bird he would often fly up to the skies and observe the forests of Ashenvale. Endlessly he'd admire the nature he observed and stay in the air for quite some time every day. Eventually Enranlaen sought to join the druids of the pack to assume the form of the wolf. Enranlaen or Ray had great respect for the wolves themselves. He consulted with the druids of the pack and learned how to shapeshift into one eventually. But as the scythe of Elune was formed, the ferocity grew upon him as it did upon others and instead of becoming wolves they became worgen. In the end he had lost his mind to the primal instincts and the violent nature of the form, thus the druids of the pack were outcasted and thrown into the emerald dream. Destined for eternal slumber under a tree. For a long time he had slept until Arugal and Velinde Starsong tampered with the scythe of Elune once more in a desperate attempt to aid them within the war effort. Oblivious to what would happen they woke up the worgen from eternal slumber.

After his long slumber, Ray looked upon Azeroth when Arugal himself summoned him along with many of his brothers. At the time aimed to battle the scourge, they did as their master had instructed. Worgen however came with a quirk, ferocity grew on them and so it did onto Ray himself. He turned against those who would consider him an ally. He killed and spread the worgen curse along with many of his kin. Eventually the said ferocity lead him and his kin to siege the keep of Baron Silverlaine. The curse would spread at a rapid speed , yet Arugal did not like this. In the end, he closed Ray along with the other worgen into the Shadowfang Keep. It is there where Ray had remained along with his brothers for a long time to come.

Soon enough the Horde came and defeated Arugal, his death soon followed. Yet the Scourge saw more use for the wizard, they brought him back as a ghost. But when the Horde it self defeated Arugal, Ray was one of the few who escaped the keep. What followed is even more spreading of the said curse which the worgen brought with them. During all of this Ray had lost the ability to shapeshift back into the form of a night elf, with that said none of the druids of the pack can shapeshift back into their original forms. He was worgen and nothing else due to the curse, ferocity and soon enough, amnesia. In his feral wanderings he had eventually come across the Scourge it self. There he was slain and afterwards raised as a death knight. Where ferocity faded, Lich King's will would have filled the faded area over Rays mind. He would hear and obey his every command but not without pained training which the scourge brought with it.

With Ray being introduced to the scourge and becoming a death knight, his memory of his past slowly faded until he could no longer remember anything. He became a mindless slave of the Lich king. When he was freed however, he still could not remember anything and thus he never truly had a name, yet after everything he named himself Ray Shadowcrest. Soon he realized he had no idea who he is, what he will do or where he will go. The hunger grew upon him and it pained him to acknowledge that he will forever be forced to kill. As he was not able to remember where he came from or how he became to be, he asked many questions and could not answer them. He wanted to know how old is he, does he have any family? All questions he could not answer. He wondered does he belong anywhere else in the world. Driven to understand and to answer his own questions, he filled in what was missing with what he thought was best. Looking through history and its books, he would decide his own age and his name. Sadly, all he remembers is the Scourge, the Lich King and nothing else. The commanding voice of the Lich king still haunts him at times, reminding him of what he is and what he did.

As he had studied the past and had gone through numerous books, he thought it was ironic that those he fought , enslaved him and his brothers to fight for them. Merely a tool handed from one hand to the other. Those he fought against, his entire purpose, was simply played with, changed. The Lich King used Arugal and there for he used the worgen brought by him.

Ray knows he killed many people due to ferocity, Arugal's will or the Lich King's. Yet today it does not trouble him as the Scourge had looked down upon all who had shown guilt or remorse. The training given by the Scourge was good for something, which is keeping the emotions at bay. If he were to show as such during his time as a minion of the Lich King he would be killed, yet his bestial nature was good enough along with the mentioned training.

He soon found out of Gilneans and their recent problems, the invasion and the curse. Yet he could never relate to them. Hollow voice, unholy aura, he just didn't fit in with them. He had no real coin to buy anything else. All he had is what the Scourge gave him and that was the saronite, the armor he wears today. After not being able to find a place he could call home, he decided to remain with the Ebon Blade. The Ebon Blade gave him plenty of tasks as the fighting in Northrend never stopped. It helped sedate his hunger, yet Ray believed there is more to this world than just killing despite his nature.

Clueless about his past, he would wander and explore, ask and study as he wanted to know more and more about how he became to be, what he was and what he did. The memory escapes him. He simply cannot remember and no one can give him the answer. In a way, he was given a new start with several drawbacks. But that did not stop him from tailoring his undead life to his own wishes and ideas that came to him. He found he enjoys hunting, fishing, cooking yet he did not need to eat. He would often ponder the idea of engineering, blacksmithing even, but could never commit. It merely remained as an idea as he had no knowledge of such. Traveling was his favorite as it allowed him to stop anywhere near a proper water source and just sit there as if a statue, unmoving, unbreathing, but fishing.

All he will remain is nothing but a fighter, an instrument of death as he had often signed up as a mercenary anywhere he could. He had little use for coin, unless it was for buying fishing supplies and the like. Many fell by his sword, claws and fangs yet he remembers little of them, if nothing. As he grew away from fighting, he became a nomad. He would travel the world, move from one place to the other. Searching for something that would make him stay. He would kill when he had to, but he picked his targets carefully. Often they would be wild and hostile animals such as wolves or other. Whether he will find what he is looking for remains to be seen.
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#2
Quote:Height: 8 feet / 2.43 m (Scale 1.15) Arugals worgen were taller than the worgen of Gilneas (for some reason).

While Argual's worgen were indeed taller than the average worgen scale-wise, please understand that scale 1.15 is an immense leap from the 1 scale. You can see significant difference alone in the 1.1 scale. I would suggest keeping Ray as 1.1.
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#3
(08-25-2013, 08:18 AM)Rini Wrote:
Quote:Height: 8 feet / 2.43 m (Scale 1.15) Arugals worgen were taller than the worgen of Gilneas (for some reason).

While Argual's worgen were indeed taller than the average worgen scale-wise, please understand that scale 1.15 is an immense leap from the 1 scale. You can see significant difference alone in the 1.1 scale. I would suggest keeping Ray as 1.1.

The only reason why I decided to try and have scale 1.15 approved is because I have worgen at 1.1 and they are around 2/2.29m. Seeing how Arugals minions were taller and perhaps more muscular. I thought I'd make that apparent. Unless there is no other way past this, I will indeed make that 1.1 scale. Or simply delete the scale thing.
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#4
(08-25-2013, 10:21 AM)Dug Wrote:
(08-25-2013, 08:18 AM)Rini Wrote:
Quote:Height: 8 feet / 2.43 m (Scale 1.15) Arugals worgen were taller than the worgen of Gilneas (for some reason).

While Argual's worgen were indeed taller than the average worgen scale-wise, please understand that scale 1.15 is an immense leap from the 1 scale. You can see significant difference alone in the 1.1 scale. I would suggest keeping Ray as 1.1.

The only reason why I decided to try and have scale 1.15 approved is because I have worgen at 1.1 and they are around 2/2.29m. Seeing how Arugals minions were taller and perhaps more muscular. I thought I'd make that apparent. Unless there is no other way past this, I will indeed make that 1.1 scale. Or simply delete the scale thing.

According to the scale guide here, an eight foot worgen would be scale 1.2. Please do bump down your character's height.
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#5
EDIT: Totally misread what you wrote there. I just woke up. 1.2 > 1.15.
The reason why I put it there is I saw that on the wiki they are as tall as 8 feet. So I used the converter.
Which height should I put him as? (as in real height, without scale stuff)
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#6
A 1.15 worgen would be 7'8''!

Quote:Skills and Abilities: None

If this is blank, please simply remove it entirely.

Quote:(I assume somewhere around that age I hope you can help me with this, he's been around ever since Arugal brought the worgen into the world)

This too.

Quote:Unholy, green, armor made of saronite. A full set no doubt.

There's no need for commas there, and 'A full set no doubt' isn't a full sentence - change the full stop before 'A' to a comma.

Quote:Ray is a rather calm and collected death knight. Indifferent yet decisive in what he wishes to do

Same again here. Change that full stop to a comma.

Quote:explain things in detail, he picks his words

This one's a run-on sentence. I advise changing the comma to a semi-colon.

Quote:strives him to kill, in such times during observation

Same thing here. Change the comma to a full stop.


The way the history is written is quite odd. The third paragraph is the start of his life with Arugal, but the first describes what happened at a later date. There's also no mention of his life before becoming a worgen, and the last two paragraphs are more descriptions of his personality than history. I'd like you to take some time to try and reorder the history so it's chronological, and make sure you have the following:

- His life before becoming a worgen;
- How he became a worgen; and
- How he became a death knight.

Post back here when you've made some edits. :)
[Image: RtK7PiZ.png]
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#7
I've fixed everything except the backstory, mainly because of some confusions and what confuses me greatly is the following:

Wiki Wrote:Originally a respected patriot of Gilneas, Arugal eventually became a member of the Kirin Tor of Dalaran. However, after the Scourge destroyed Dalaran and most of its populace, he fled to Shadowfang Keep above Pyrewood Village.[1] Frustrated by their lack of progress, and against the advice of his peers, Arugal used Ur's research[2] to summon extra-dimensional entities to bolster Dalaran's diminishing ranks of his own. Arugal's summoning brought the ravenous worgen into the world of Azeroth. The feral wolf-men slaughtered not only the Scourge, but quickly turned on the wizards themselves. The worgen sieged the keep of the noble Baron Silverlaine. Situated above the tiny hamlet of Pyrewood, the keep quickly fell into shadow and ruin. Driven mad with guilt, Arugal adopted the worgen as his children and retreated to the newly dubbed 'Shadowfang Keep'. He resided there, protected by his massive pet, Fenrus — and haunted by the vengeful ghost of Baron Silverlaine.[1]

If he was summoned from somewhere, somehow, as a worgen. Would he even have had a life as something else that is not worgen? There for questioning if he was merely created as such and never anything else. As for how he became a death knight I assume this happened when Scourge took control of Arugals minions and him.
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#8
Arugal summoned and was then manipulated by Alpha Prime (Ralaar Fangfire). The two then started the Gilnean Wolf Cult, where followers willingly became worgen, and had such trials as hunting and killing folk (the Starlight Slasher murders). Arugal is then killed, and raised as a ghost by a san'layn, I believe. Then he's established in Northrend on Bloodmoon Isle.

So, you can go two ways, I think:
A) Someone in the Gilnean area that either willingly became a worgen, or was caught and bit.
B) Someone in Northrend that was caught and bit.
[Image: tumblr_nfm4t0FZcT1rtcd58o1_r1_500.gif]
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#9
Some worgen were summoned into Azeroth, indeed, but some were the cursed denizens of Pyrewood, while others were those bitten by other worgen. I'd like to see some clarification as to which of these he was!

Quote:As for how he became a death knight I assume this happened when Scourge took control of Arugals minions and him.

Indeed! But it needs to be in the history.
[Image: RtK7PiZ.png]
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#10
Alright I edited it.
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#11
Looking much better! There's only little things to run through now.

First, could you put the penultimate paragraph into the personality instead of history? It doesn't have any history in it, really, and more describes his psyche than anything else.


Second, there's a handful of grammatical errors I'll run you through quickly.

The following are run-on sentences or fragments. Change the red commas to full stops and the red full stops to commas!

Quote:Worgen however came with a quirk, ferocity grew on them and so it did onto Ray himself.
Quote:Soon enough the horde came and defeated Arugal, his death soon followed
Quote:After Ray became free of the Lich Kings control over him. He realized he had no idea who he is
Quote:His undeath brought memory loss, he could not remember anything. His age, nor his purpose, let alone the place he came from.
Quote:After Ray became free of the Lich Kings control over him. He realized he had no idea who he is, what he will do or where he will go.
Quote:His undeath brought memory loss, he could not remember anything.
Quote:had looked down upon all who had shown guilt or remorse, the training given by the scourge was good for something
Quote:coin to buy anything else, all he had is what the scourge
Quote:how he became to be. What he was and what he did
Quote:idea of engineering, blacksmithing even. But could never commit

There's a few little mistakes I'll point out so you can fix them all.

You forget to capitalise the H in Horde and the S in Scourge throughout the history, and
you sometimes forget the apostrophe in possessive words - Arugal's, Lich King's, etc.

Quote:Traveling being his favorite as it allowed

Change 'being' to 'was'.

Quote:Will he find what he is looking for remains to be seen.

Change 'Will' to 'Whether' and add 'will' between 'he' and 'find'.

And, finally, run the history through a spell checker. It'll pick up words like Azeroth and worgen, but there's a few dictionary words that are misspelled in the history.

Thanks! :)
[Image: RtK7PiZ.png]
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#12
I think I fixed it all. Ran through spell check aswell, caught some mistakes and fixed them.
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#13
Approved!

Wikified!
[Image: RtK7PiZ.png]
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#14
@Dug

Let's talk about this profile, Dug. I'll just get right into the problem with it.

You were summoned by Arugal, which would make you a Kaldorei Worgen, which would make your character over 9000 years old or so. However, according to you, the worgen is just a worgen. Not elf, not human, just worgen. Furthermore, along with just being summoned into existence, you put his age at 30. Let me explain it simply: If he didn't exist until he was summoned, he would be 10 years old.

I'm guessing, by the class, that you want a Pyrewood human that becomes a worgen death knight. Let's work to make that happen.
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#15
wiki Wrote:Originally a respected patriot of Gilneas, Arugal eventually became a member of the Kirin Tor of Dalaran. However, after the Scourge destroyed Dalaran and most of its populace, he fled to Shadowfang Keep above Pyrewood Village.[1] Frustrated by their lack of progress, and against the advice of his peers, Arugal used Ur's research[2] to summon extra-dimensional entities to bolster Dalaran's diminishing ranks of his own. Arugal's summoning brought the ravenous worgen into the world of Azeroth.

Hence.

Mathias Wrote:just being summoned into existence

That's basically where I got the idea from. I roleplayed him not knowing where he came from or how he got into Azeroth as in he had memory loss. The age I was iffy about, I rped him later on as if he had no idea how old he is.
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