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Retail Downers
Oh yes. *clicks fingers* My time to shine. I may not have played retail but I DO have a horrible... vampire RP experience. This private server might aswell be as bad as retail...

So. Vampire RP was increasing on my old server, so I thought "Eh, I'll give it a go." So once I got in, it actually wasn't TOO bad. For vampire RP. Although they were able to go out in the sun which confused me a lot, but anyway!

So my... sixth or seventh RP I had was with a group this time. 2 girls and a dude. One of the girls calls me into her bedroom (it's not what you think! It's worse...) and asks me to drop my pants, and the RP went a little something like this.

<Retard> Pull down your pants.
<Me> ... -What?-
<Retard> The quicker we do this, the quicker it'll be over with.
<Me> ... Get away from me you slag.
<Retard> /e drops down <Me>'s pants and bites off his dick. She then walks into her friends room and sits on her bed, handing it to her. "Look. It's a dildo."

I pressed Alt + F4 and never went there again. EVER.

And I'm sure some of you have heard me mention this ingame... but now it's for all to see! :x
"I am more afraid of one hundred sheep led by a lion than one hundred lions led by a sheep."
My RP-Experiences from Retail are actually mostly good - Even the Scarlet Guild behaved decently, even though the concept of a Scarlet Outbreak Faction that never, ever leaves Stormwind is a bit far-fetched.
Then again, I mostly kept in the clique that contained all the dwarves, human immigrants to Menethil and occasionally the Guilds from Theramore, that were mostly great folks - Thus avoiding most of the junk that drifted into Stormwind all the time, or so rumour would have it.

I do remember this faction of lesbian female vampire elves though, temporarily setting up shop in Goldshire. That was interesting.
There was also a guild of gnomes that RP'ed as Human Children, but they didn't really meet much goodwill outside Elwynn, so eventually they all got bored and left.
Hogral Coalbeard - Impulsive Explorer
The worst things I ran into(Top5):

5. The vampire daughter of Illidan/Kael'thas.
4. Any kind of Werewolf, some used the furbolg turning thingy as a werewolf form.
3. People RPing as if they owned Goldshire/Stormwind.
2. Anything Night Elves did in Goldshire.
1. Gnomes RPing human children who were children but still said OOCly and ICly that they could PWN you because thier character was so powerful.
Mabra Dragonbasher- A battle hungry dwarven lady, hirable for personal protection and for larger tasks requiring violence.
This is all from Moonglade EU.

One was a blood elf female who RPed that her character had both a tail and wings, and every single emote had to explain that. Me and my social circle eventually dubbed this poor girl 'WingWingTail'. We loled and moved on and had to blink our eyes a few weeks later when WingWingTail had a friend, who also had wings and a tail, galloping around Silvermoon thinking nothing of it.

Two very well known players in the RP and raid communities also galloped around Silvermoon, without pants and constantly having gay eRP in public chat/emotes caused nothing but drama when they were caught out - many of the server made a hobby of screen screenshotting them when they caught them. Eventually they moved onto DK characters and tried to make out they were different people in some way but the humping continued right away and for the most part everyone knew it was them after a few hours.

Other notable chars include:

Lovely Belf who threw bombs at people idly going 'oops!'
Typical Shonen-esque character whom named everyone of his combat moves. I remember 'ICE-SLASH', I defeated this person thrice, fun times.
Many, many dragonkin. One even went around Orgrimmar with the dragonwhelp pet claiming it was her baby.

I'll add to this list if I remember more.
Yukai the Spiritwalker; Answers come in my sleep.
Look at me! I can shamelessly link my storythread too!
[Image: 2ms1row.jpg]

For starters..

This alongside many Demons, Vampires, Canal Pirates and Dragons
Little by little, one travels far.
i like the kitty above me..

Yes yes, meow. I bet that would give kinky ERP.

And yes, I find myself very funny!

I feel almost left out. My only retail experiences were on Bonechewer PvE and Vashj (Trashj) PvP.
The Argent Dawn (Land of the free, home of the 'strange') RP realm was my stomping grounds. I have nothing but awkward memories of having a nice conversation with a level 1 Human Warrior.

Him: Hey Babe.
Me: Hi.
Him: Do you want to get naked for me in Northshire?
Me: Uh?
Him: I like animals!

Good times, good times.

I also loved the feeling that you were never good another for any of the 'experienced' roleplayers because they were all level 70 and you were just a level 30. So all the Night Elves would sit along the fence outside of Goldshire and talk about music they like and how much their new robes rocks before the go silent and undress.

I was always envious of them.
[Image: Untitled-332.png]
A friend tried to convince me to play on Argent Dawn. I reluctantly agreed to roll a blood elf girl, seeing as he had said that all the roleplay was in Silvermoon. And because I didn't feel like getting mocked for not rolling a barbie like everyone else.

As soon as I spawned in the starting area, I got a whisper telling me to "join the /darknest channel for ERP". I declined and received a tell with ]_> whatever then weirdo"

I began questing, but when I was about to leave the first area, a group of level 70 "roleplayers" came up to me and blocked me from leaving. They were two blood elf men and a women, who proceeded to emote that they shackled me and undressed me on the spot, and said that I was now their sex slave. I tried to leave and they began shouting tells and profanities in brackets at me saying I was metagaming and I would be reported. I blocked them all and headed for Silvermoon, upset by this messed up occurrence.

Once in Silvermoon, I waited for my friend to get out of a raid. I sat in the bar when another blood elf walked up behind me and began kissing my characters neck out of nowhere. He then emoted that he took her by the throat, slammed her on the counter had had his very explicit way with her, in front of the five other people in the tavern. None of whom reacted to this AT ALL.

I logged off, deleted the character and never clicked on "Argent Dawn" again.
I am unwilling to say my experiences on Retail for a couple of reasons:

1. I hardly remember most of them.

2. I may have taken part in the stuff, being very inexperienced with WoW lore.

3. I hardly saw anything wrong with the Scarlet Crusade guild headed by Mikaylus, for the same reason as #2.

Yes, yes. Laugh.
10,000 days in the fire is long enough,
You're going home...
Cat Night Elf Blood.

Excuse me, what?
We're all doomed
Maxwell Wrote:Cat Night Elf Blood.

Excuse me, what?

I'm going to make a guess here, and figure that's what happens if a night elf in cat form gets it on with a person who's 20% demon blood. Or...something.
I guess she liked having a tail for certain purposes I will refrain from mentioning.
Little by little, one travels far.
One time on retail. Only once, I stuck to my bud's private server for a long time.
Basically on retail this is what happened.

My female human warlock was walking through Duskwood on her usual dark business and then.
A pair of forsaken males jumped me and tried to rape my character.
They are corpses for Peat's sake!

I just did exit game, deleted my char and my bud told me his server was ready.
[Image: lich_king_signature_by_wyrx-d3jo9rm.png]
I have a story.

On an RP server (can't remember which one), there was an RP project going on. The project was located at the Westbrook Garrison. The project involved having a Lord own the place as his own fort, and people serving him in various manners. Some were chefs, shouting for the people when the dinner was ready. Some were guards, keeping the place free from the vampiric night elf-dragon thieves, and you know. Alot of positions available. I was greatly interested in the project, so I headed down there with my character Deteras; a human footman, and immediately noticed how the RP was evolved. The people RPed basic guards and chefs and etcetera, and the idea appealed to me. I became a guard there, and then I RPed from there.

A few days later, the leader of the project decided that the guards would have a level limit. This didn't disturb me too much, since I wasn't too experienced with parting game-mechanics and IC. So, I went up on the roof, where the smart and logical leader would test fight us. And of course, through duelling. Here is where I started doubting his ability. He duelled me, and one-shotted me (me being level 12: him... Alot higher). Because of this, a game-mechanic, he said "Ok your kikced lol". When I tried to talk sense, in OOC brackets so all of his little goons could hear aswell, they all just "lol you can't take a hit, your no good guard" and "your hp is to low lawl".

Ugh, I could elaborate more, but I think you all got the point. This great RP project was led by these kewl dewds, and I couldn't be more annoyed. The end.

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