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Syyia [Kal'dorei, Hunter]
#1
Player: Syyia(Ali to some)

Character Full Name: Syyia Whiterush

Character In-Game Name: Syyia

Class: Hunter

Nickname(s): N/A

Association(s):None.

Skills and Abilities: Syyia learned to do simple crafts at an early age such as weave, sew and garden. Syyia also has a moderate amount of skill in archery as well as wielding an axe.

Age: 369

Sex: Female

Hair: Natural long hair extending past her shoulders, purple like a twilight sky.

Eyes: Silver

Weight: 159

Height: 6'5’

Usual Garments/Armor: Syyia usually displays herself in a dark leather armor, strapping’s that line her boots connect with her pant’s the attire is usually tight and form fitting to allow faster running speeds. Also, Syyia wears a Darnassian tabard as well as a cloak that covers her hair and part of her face. Weapons include a bow and a single mid-sized ax.

Other: Syyia is a war-torn woman, scars and various other impurities scatter her body from wounds, burns and spell effects alike.

Alignment: Law Neutral.

Personality: Syyia is cold to most, her calculating eyes ever vigilant her shady and rough past can sometimes make her a brash and chaotic person, though more often then not she is calm even when the world and people around her descend into disarray.
Syyia can be a hard worker, though only when she wants to be, most of the time she will try to use her wit to get out of work, or even occasionally try to use her feminine form to distract the person from what they had asked of her.

History: Syyia was born in Ashenvale secluded from even her own people, her parents were pure naturalists as following the normal culture of her people. Syyias childhood was rather serene, her mother hunted and her father was a rare breed of his time, a priest though normally a female role in that time period, he sought only to help those in need. Syyias father was away quite often, called to places to help the injured and sick.

Syyia had begun to show strange characteristics when she hit the part of her life humans would call "tween" years, her interest in religion dwindled, as did how much she revered and respected nature. Syyias body had become much less in tune with the world and nature than others of her kind, her interests lay in the past, of the well of eternity and the high elves. The thought of magic sparked her interests; however those interests were soon crushed by her parents. Syyia was soon forced onto the path of priesthood by her parents in the hope that they could rekindle her lost interest in the Kal’dorei faith.

It was not until her late “teenage” years that she was finally able to pull herself from the path of Elune, feeling betrayed by her parents she fled and decided to live in the forest alone, years of assisting her mother hunting and gathering let her live in the forest. It was in this place that she came to respect nature much like she used to, though still sometimes feeling rather indifferent she lived among the beasts until she was nearly an adult.

With maturity and new found respect for the wilderness, Syyia returned home to her place of birth. Her arrival was welcomed by her mother, but alas she learned that her father had passed. Her mother distraught with grief, had asked many priests to resurrect her love, but all failed she was told that husband was refusing to return to his body. Syyia decided to stay with her mother despite their indifference on opinions of faith.

The years passed slowly for Syyia, her mother slowly slipped into a bout of psychosis, obsessing of her dead father. The time came that her mother would spend every waking hour with nothing more than a necklace her father had woven of his own hair, laying in the corner of the room whilst spoke to herself. Syyia was forced to care for her mother, feed her and bathe her, lest she starved to death and died.

It took many years before her mother was finally able to care for herself again, but there was not peace long for Syyia, she soon learned of the orcs whom had begun to chop down the trees of Ashenvale. Even with her own sub-par feelings to the forest, she still respected it, it had given her food, it had given her shelter and it was a place she still called home. Syyia found what the orcs had done to be unacceptable, she gladly joined with her brethren to fight these terrible foes.

Nearly a year passed a year of terrible bloodshed and many battles for her homeland, some of those battles she nearly died. Those battles scarred her mind and her body, though she continued to fight, on one particular battle, she accidentally felled an orcish child. She realized what this war was doing to both sides; Syyia was haunted with grief through the rest of her battles, she had killed an innocent she could not forgive herself for what she had done, her fighting slowley lost passion.

After the fall and death of Cenarius Syyia fell into a depression, she pulled out of the offensive against the orcish people. Unlike many whom saw only the side of their own people, she saw both sides. Yes the orcs were chopping down trees of her homeland, but the orcs needed these tree’s to build shelter, to construct weapons to hunt to feed themselves and their young. She showed sympathy for the orcs she of course kept this secret from her people.

She returned to her old ways of solitude, laying down her ax, using her bow only to hunt. Refusing to fight against the orcish people because of the damage it did to both sides. However word soon spread of the Legion and Archimondes assault on mount Hyjal. Once she took up arms and prepared she once again for war, her hunting prowess gave her much skill in the art of stealth, she was used as a scout to warn a base of the Legions impeding arrival. There were many instances when the battle was lost, forcing her to retreat rather than be killed.

Victory came at last when Archimonde was slain by the power of the world tree and Malfurion. However the happiness was short-lived when she saw what had become of the great tree Nordrassil. The leaves of the great tree had been torn away, leaving it heavily damaged. For the first time in centuries she actually felt connected to nature. Syyia dropped to her knees and cried. After the battle was over Syyia contemplated weather to move home.

Syyia decided against the latter and moved to the wilds of Darkshore, mostly desolate besides the beasts that roamed the land. She befriended a bear whom she called Sindrassil for the reddish circle that line his cranium. For a few years her and her faithful companion lived in serenity in the gloom of the quiet forests. Again her axe gathered dust and her bow was use only as a purpose of hunting.

Syyia had secluded herself from the world around her once again, more years past, she was completely unaware of the dark portal being opened and closed. Syyia was even unaware of the continent known as Northrend being discovered. It was not until she had found Auberdine that she had finally learned of all of the recent happening. Years before Auberdine had been filled with nothing more than ruins and a few lonely souls, but now it seem to flourish with new buildings and new people, the change in such little time astonished her.

The news of all of the happenings drove Syyia to want to see her mother again, wondering how she was and if she still lived. She traveled back to her homeland, and to the secluded place that her and her family once lived, once there she found her mother. Syyias mother had become well again and was no longer in the shambling state in which she had once been. Syyia settled in with her mother, again the difference in faith was set aside for the mutual respect of the bond between mother and daughter.

Another year had passed, it was one of the most quick and easy years she had ever experienced, she lived with her mother and Sindrassil in the forests, she hunted and brought home food for the family. Her mother stayed home and often read Syyia’s journals and reflections on the fights she had once been in. One thing in particular had caught her attention, Syyias feelings towards the orcish, they scared and confused her.

It was not long until Syyias mother told the sentinels of her own daughter, Syyia had found about the treacherous thing her mother had done. Syyia attempted to slip from the lands of her people under cover of dark. Alas, her beloved Sindrassil was left behind; she hoped they spared his life. Though she fled and left her only friend, it was not long till she came back in total secrecy to retrieve him. The way was treacherous and many times she was nearly caught. Syyia eventually prevailed and escaped to the barrens with her faithful companion.

She journeyed along the gold road avoiding the orcs sights best she could; only traveling at night when she could not be seen. For nearly a month she wandered the dark, cold sands of the barren night. She eventually found Ratchet, she met a man there named Arabyss whom told her of Booty Bay where she soon traveled to, and she continues to travel searching for a new place to call home, searching for a soul to call a friend.
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#2
I'm fairly lore weak when it comes to the Kal'dorei (as well as much of the rest of WoW), but I point out something that did catch my attention. I know you're sensitive towards criticism, but fear not: I am making this statement to correct and educate you on something other players may find distaste if not offense to.

Quote:The years passed slowly for Syyia, her mother slowly slipped into a stage of, dementia obsessing of her dead father.The time came that her mother would spend every waking hour with nothing more then a necklace her father had weaved from his own hair, laying in the corner of the room and spoke to herself, she was forced to care for her mother feed her and bathe her, lest she starved to death and died.


Dementia is a condition in which cognitive ability is dropped due to physical damage to the brain, either from injury or disease. In humans, this is often seen in aging wherein dementia is one of many symptoms of Alzheimer's. Actual symptoms of dementia include loss of memory, lowered ability in problem solving, language inhibition, and so forth. It is not, however, the same as loss of contact with reality.

I would actually describe Syyia's mother having a bout of psychosis rather than dementia, which is where sufferers would have episodes of delusions, impaired insight, and so forth. I still caution, however, in how you portray or describe psychological conditions in the near future (don't worry, if you have questions, I can surely help :) ).


Quote:Nearly a year passed, a year of terrible bloodshed and many battles for her homeland, some of those battles she nearly died. Those battles scarred her mind and her body, though she continued to fight, on one particular battle, she noticed a small figure amngst the bloody heaps of dead, it was a child pale green skin, an orcish child. She realized what this war was doing to both sides, she then realized she had been the one to kill this particular child, her green feathered arrow protruding from its neck.

I'd caution against the explicit mention of the slaughter of a child, though I probably am not one to talk as I also have a profile where a child dies. This is moreso because of how the server population is generally sensitive to the welfare of children in-universe. I will, though, let the Forum Helpers and other GMs decide on this.


Quote:It was not long until Syyias mother told the sentinels of her own daughter, she was accused of being an enemy sympathizer she explained she merely felt this way because of what she had seen. Harsh punishment was not given to her in light of her years of fighting for her people, though she was not spared, her beloved Sindrassil was captured and taken from her, and she was expelled from the land of her people.

Syyia grew lonely for the first time in her life, she began to wander the lands of the humans, though she was seen as an oddity and sometimes looked down upon, the human lands excited her, a land of technology and magic, she was finally free to chase her interests and learn, something she had been forbidden to do as a child.

Even in light of her new found freedom, she could not help but become bitter at the thought of her mother, how she had betrayed her and how she had ruined her life. She cured her for the loss of her beloved bear she pleaded to her people to have her bear back, it took a long time but eventually they obliged and she was reunited with her partner and beloved friend, they set out together, banished but happy.


This one is a bit questionable, particularly how the sentinels would truly handle an enemy sympathizer. I'll have the Forum Helpers and GM team check this out.



In addition to the above passages, I noticed you have a lot of grammar mistakes, particularly in that you have a lot of punctuation errors, spacing errors, run-on sentences, and fragments. I highly recommend you copy-paste your profile to a word processor with a spell and grammar check before you repost your profile.

Hope that helps!
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#3
I fixed this to the best of my abilities. As for the part about the child, Azeroth is a place that has been in turmoil for years one cannot expect that children would be spared, also she did not enjoy killing the child I think you will find she felt rather guilty about the entire thing. I would also like to defend my point by saying; Go watch the evening news, I am positive you will hear much worst by the time the broadcast is over.
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#4
Quote:Syyia had begun to show strange characteristics when she hit the part of her life humans...
Quote:Yes the orcs were chopping down trees of her homeland, but the orcs needed these trees to build shelter,
Quote:It took many years before her mother was finally able to care for herself again, but there was not peace long for Syyia, she soon learned of the orcs whom had begun to chop down the trees of Ashenvale. Even with her own sub-par feelings to the forest, she still respected it, it had given her food, it had given her shelter and it was a place she still called home. Syyia found what the orcs had done to be unacceptable, she gladly joined with her brethren to fight these terrible foes.

These are plurals rather than contractions, and don't require an apostrophe.

Spoiler:
Dogs = More than one dog: The dogs were barking.
Dog's = Dog is, or belonging to the dog: The dog's outside./That ball is the dog's.

I'm not very comfortable with the fact of the child's death being given explicit and relatively graphic mention. If it was a passing mention of, 'She accidentally felled an orc child' and then detailed her reaction to the event, I'd be happier approving that. It's a case of being tasteful over realistic.
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#5
(12-09-2011, 05:29 AM)Delta Wrote:
Quote:Syyia had begun to show strange characteristics when she hit the part of her life humans...
Quote:Yes the orcs were chopping down trees of her homeland, but the orcs needed these trees to build shelter,
Quote:It took many years before her mother was finally able to care for herself again, but there was not peace long for Syyia, she soon learned of the orcs whom had begun to chop down the trees of Ashenvale. Even with her own sub-par feelings to the forest, she still respected it, it had given her food, it had given her shelter and it was a place she still called home. Syyia found what the orcs had done to be unacceptable, she gladly joined with her brethren to fight these terrible foes.

These are plurals rather than contractions, and don't require an apostrophe.

Spoiler:
Dogs = More than one dog: The dogs were barking.
Dog's = Dog is, or belonging to the dog: The dog's outside./That ball is the dog's.

I'm not very comfortable with the fact of the child's death being given explicit and relatively graphic mention. If it was a passing mention of, 'She accidentally felled an orc child' and then detailed her reaction to the event, I'd be happier approving that. It's a case of being tasteful over realistic.

I attempted to make it more tasteful, sorry I am used to writing and role playing in communities that appreciate my attention to detail for such things. Also, thank you for pointing out those errors I fixed them, there were alot more of them than previously pointed out by you, thanks Delta :D

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#6
Quote:Syyia was haunted with grief through the rest of her battles, she had killed an innocent she could not forgive herself for what she had done, her fighting slowley lost passion.

I would like to ask as well with this sentence, the grieved through the rest of the battles? Or just for the remainder of that one battle?

But other then my nubness only thing with that part was some words were stuck together and needed to be spaced :3
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#7
The reason why child killing profiles are not allowed is because some people do not feel comfortable by it. Ofcourse you see far worse at the news ETC. But for some people that haves child's by their own it can be sensitive :P Thats why its something like a rule now also because this server is 13+ I think.
But in profiles its not that bad I guess since its their own choice to read your profile :P But Icly RPing that kind of RP is only allowed in party chat. Same as Rape etc.

But nice profile btw :D
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#8
On the point of killing children, it is sensitive for some people. However, it is that person's choice if they are effected by it or not. Your emotions should not rule over you in such a way that some graphic writing on a childs death will make you cry. It is possible to choose what upsets you, it is possible to simply ignore it. The matter of life and death is sensitive yes, but it is going a little over-board to suggest that no one can rp it. And if it does upset someone, it isn't likely to make them do anything stupid in real life, other than being a little sore emotionally.

Thats just my opinion, I also have other strong views on other areas aswell that I have yet to mention on this server. One of those being throwing CW's at people your character has never met before.
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#9
The GMs asked for it to be removed.
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#10
That might be, but no one is right one-hundred percent of the time. No one group of people can constantly make right descions. If I don't agree with someone about something, i'll have a discussion with them. I am not here to argue, but then again, I am not here to bow down to the commands of people. This is a world where discussion is key. Just because someone you care about, tells you to jump off a bridge, do you do it?
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#11
It's an opinion. The GMs are discomforted by it, so they wish it removed. I don't really see where the discussion would be, maybe if the GMs are really discomforted with it?
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#12
Why do they act a certain way to it? There is always an idea to an emotion, they tie somewhere. If you solve the problem in the idea, then the emotional tie dissapears. I am simply trying to solve the problem without any changes that, in my opinion, don't really need to be changed.
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#13
Yes yes but the game is 13+ and RP like that is not allowed on this server. I also did it with my character but that's why some RP should stay in party chat because the server must stay fun with everyone :P That's why there is a rule for not doing that kind of RP when someone is not comfortable with.
Its basically the same with the CW's from people you never seen before if someone is not comfortable with it he does not have to accept the CW.
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#14
Valid reasons I suppose, is there anyway to alter it, perhaps saying she simply killed a child in that case? Without the gruesome bits that people are concerned about?
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#15
I don't know :O You could set that part in a "spoiler" Window so they can choose for themselves to read it :O But I'm not a GM so I can't say that :3
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