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Wallace[Worgen, Warrior]
#1
Player: unidragon

Character Full Name: Wallace Helmstone

Character In-Game Name: Wallace

Nickname(s): None

Association(s): Mordecai Tiller, The Candle Light Society

Race: Worgen

Class: Warrior

Skills and Abilities: Cannot become human. He is very close to his primal and beastly self, though thanks to Mordecai he can keep his beastly side under control.

Age: 20

Sex: Male

Hair(Fur): Grey

Eyes: Yellow

Weight: 140Kg

Height: 2.3m

Usual Garments/Armor: He is very picky with his armor, oddly. Therefore he sticks to only one set of armor; a vest, a pair of leggings and a pair of gloves. He also wears a helmet that covers his face.

Other: And as said, cannot switch to human form.

Alignment: Neutral

Personality: He is pretty calm if nothing bothers him, though if angered he won't hesitate to harm, or in worse cases, kill. He sticks to his one and only friend, Mordecai Tiller. Hates Gnomes and Goblins. He usually doesn't speak a lot when he's with Mordecai unless spoken to, and not really much when alone either. But he is a very proud Worgen and gets easily offended when his race is insulted. He is very loyal to Mordecai, but has his own will and mind. Mordecai uses Wallace's lack of intelligence to his advantage, making Wallace believe that all of Mordecai's ideas are genius and rarely questions them. Yet some of Mord's ideas and plans go way too wrong and badly planned.

In his previous life, before the attack on Gilneas, Wallace was a strong but foolish human. He didn't think of the consequenses of his actions all the time and had little common sense. In general, he was not intelligent.

History:
Human life: Wallace started off as a Human brawler from Silverpine Forest named Darwin. He was a very strong fighter even before the curse hit him, but he was also pretty stupid. He had little common sense and tried to stay away from crowds of people. He stayed away from people because his behavior wasn't appreciated by some. One day, when he went out to hunt in the woods, he came across a cursed worgen and was attacked.

Attack period: When the curse got into his mind, he turned into a ruthless beast that would attempt to kill anything that bothered him. When he was released and let out to the wall of Gilneas, he went on a rampage but was knocked out cold early in the attack by a Gilnean soldier. When the attack was over, he had no idea where he was or what had happened, he simply observed the scene around him and then ran off to the forest. He tried to find his way back to Silverpine Forest, but got lost and had no where to go. But then he came across a Gilnean named Mordecai, whom had helped to work on the cure. Mordecai had an unfinished version of the elexir and used it on Wallace. But he could not make him turn human. Mordecai then named him Wallace, since neither of them knew what his real name was. Since then, Wallace has gone with Mordecai and will never follow anyone's command but Mordecai's as long as Mordecai is alive.

After the Attack: Wallace never liked getting into unecessary trouble, which happened often due to Mordecai's thievery. Mordecai tried to make him a more subtle and silent Worgen, but Wallace had no interest at all in becoming a sneaker and so Mordecai decided to make Wallace his brute friend. Later, Mordecai decided to make a society for all the thieves in Azeroth, named The Candle Light Society. Wallace wondered how he would fit in at all, having no subtle attributes. But Mordecai made him the muscle of the society. His hatred for Gnomes and Goblins comes from earlier encounters, as most of the Gnomes and Goblins he has met were unpleasant and rude. For instance, some have used foul language and some have simply insulted/offended Wallace. And Wallace was never fond of their engineering and machinery.

(I'm sorry if my profile is such a mess. I'm rather new to this and I know little about Gilnean history.)
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#2
(08-13-2013, 07:04 AM)unidragon Wrote: Usual Garments/Armor: Is very picky with his armor, oddly.

He is very picky with his armor, oddly.

Add the 'He'.

(08-13-2013, 07:04 AM)unidragon Wrote: Other: Hates Gnomes and Goblins. And as said, cannot switch to human form.

Same here.

(08-13-2013, 07:04 AM)unidragon Wrote: Personality: Pretty calm if nothing bothers him, though if angered he won't hesitate to harm, or in worse cases kill. Sticks to his one and only master; Mordecai Tiller.

Personality: He is pretty calm if nothing bothers him, though if angered he won't hesitate to harm, or in worse cases, kill. He sticks to his one and only master, Mordecai Tiller.

(08-13-2013, 07:04 AM)unidragon Wrote: History: Wallace started off as a wild Worgen attacking the wall of Gilneas, but a Gilnean named Mordecai found him and experimented with him to see if he could turn him civilized and less feral, in which he succeeded. Since then, Wallace has gone with Mordecai and will never follow anyone's command but Mordecai's as long as Mordecai is alive. He is also part of The Candle Light Society.

The history section is rather short. It would be a good idea to look at other already approved profiles. This will give you an idea of how much to write (more or less. The minimum amount of lines for the Personality and History sections are 10 lines, if I recall correctly.)

:)

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#3
That is correct. You will need to beef up the personality and history sections substantially before this could be deemed acceptable. I highly advise that you make use of the excellent character creation resources on the wiki and perhaps check into the Character-related sub-forum with in the Articles and Guides section of the forum.

Also of note, you may wish to include a bit in the history as to why he hates gnomes and goblins. While we all seem to be lovely racists ICly, a reason to hate the no-good, spineless Alliance pigs makes it alot easier to validate. Best of luck!
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#4
(08-13-2013, 09:43 AM)Nikodemos Wrote: Also of note, you may wish to include a bit in the history as to why he hates gnomes and goblins.

And on that note, this shouldn't be in your appearance section - the "Other" section is for physical things that do not normally fit in to the "garments and armour" section.

Also, the "wild worgen" that attacked Gilneas are the Sons of Arugal that went loose. They originated from Pyrewood Village mostly, as well as a few other surrounding areas. I'd ask that you put in Wallace's origins from the beginning in to your history as well.
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#5
(08-13-2013, 09:54 AM)Rini Wrote: Also, the "wild worgen" that attacked Gilneas are the Sons of Arugal that went loose. They originated from Pyrewood Village mostly, as well as a few other surrounding areas. I'd ask that you put in Wallace's origins from the beginning in to your history as well.

Not to step on a Forum Helper's toes, but this is sort of incorrect. These worgen were part of a controlled front sent by Alpha Prime to seek out the Scythe of Elune.

WoWPedia Wrote:In Gilneas he recruited Arugal and used him to spread the worgen curse to the humans of Silverpine Forest.

...

When the worgen curse afflicted Gilneas, Alpha Prime purposely afflicted Halford Ramsey with the worgen curse to stop him from discovering about the Starlight Slasher murders and the planned worgen attack on Gilneas City, as well as his true intentions.

...

It was later revealed that Alpha Prime had infiltrated Gilneas using tunnels hidden underneath the Greymane Wall. His purpose was to get the Scythe of Elune, which he planned to use to free the rest of the worgen banished in the Emerald Dream. With the Scythe of Elune bolstering his army's ranks, he planned to later attack Darnassus and exact revenge on Malfurion Stormrage. To these ends, he allied himself with the Forsaken and used the worgen attack on Gilneas City to weaken the nation's defenses for the Forsaken invasion.
[Image: tumblr_nfm4t0FZcT1rtcd58o1_r1_500.gif]
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#6
(08-13-2013, 11:02 AM)c0rzilla Wrote:
(08-13-2013, 09:54 AM)Rini Wrote: Also, the "wild worgen" that attacked Gilneas are the Sons of Arugal that went loose. They originated from Pyrewood Village mostly, as well as a few other surrounding areas. I'd ask that you put in Wallace's origins from the beginning in to your history as well.

Not to step on a Forum Helper's toes, but this is sort of incorrect. These worgen were part of a controlled front sent by Alpha Prime to seek out the Scythe of Elune.

WoWPedia Wrote:In Gilneas he recruited Arugal and used him to spread the worgen curse to the humans of Silverpine Forest.

...

When the worgen curse afflicted Gilneas, Alpha Prime purposely afflicted Halford Ramsey with the worgen curse to stop him from discovering about the Starlight Slasher murders and the planned worgen attack on Gilneas City, as well as his true intentions.

...

It was later revealed that Alpha Prime had infiltrated Gilneas using tunnels hidden underneath the Greymane Wall. His purpose was to get the Scythe of Elune, which he planned to use to free the rest of the worgen banished in the Emerald Dream. With the Scythe of Elune bolstering his army's ranks, he planned to later attack Darnassus and exact revenge on Malfurion Stormrage. To these ends, he allied himself with the Forsaken and used the worgen attack on Gilneas City to weaken the nation's defenses for the Forsaken invasion.

Oh, dukes! Sorry about that, thanks for the correction!
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#7
Okay, I changed the post now. Looking better?
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#8
Quote:Nickname(s):
You can remove this if it is blank, since it is optional, or simply put a "N/A" there.

Quote:Weight: 130Kg

Height: 2m
His weight here is very heavy for his height. You can check out heights and weights here.

And please do add more to his personality and history Grin2 I would suggest going to his history from the very beginning and working from there. While Wallace didn't know his origins, it should be shared with us in the profile, as the history contains OOC information that sometimes even your own character isn't aware of.
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#9
Think I got it know. How is it?
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#10
Ohai. I read through your history and took it piece by piece! Hope it helps.

(08-13-2013, 07:04 AM)unidragon Wrote: History: Wallace started off as a Human brawler from Silverpine Forest named Darwin. He was a very strong fighter even before the curse hit him, but also rather stupid. He didn't always obey the rules, but mainly because he didn't know about some of them. He stayed away from people because his behavior wasn't appreciated by some people.

The start seems a little strange to me? What does stupid mean? What rules didn't he know about? Who is his brother, and why wasn't he appreciated? And what does that have to do with Wallace?

Quote:Then when the curse came to him, he became a ruthless beast and almost killed anything that would try to interract with him. When he was released and let out to the wall of Gilneas, he went on a rampage but was knocked out cold early in the attack by a Gilnean soldier.

I advise elaborating a little on how he got the curse. Was he assaulted by a random worgen in the woods? What was he doing in the woods? Did he find the Wolf Cult enticing, and try to join?

Quote:When the attack was over, he had no idea where he was or what had happened, he simply observed the scene around him and then ran off to the forest. He tried to find his way back to Silverpine Forest, but got lost and had no where to go. But a Gilnean named Mordecai found him and experimented with him to see if he could turn him civilized and less feral, in which he succeeded.

This right here is kind of a problem. What methods did Mordecai use to bring sanity back to Wallace? The cure is a huge breakthrough, made by royal chemist Krennan Arannas, not to be handed out willy nilly. If it took that guy so much effort and time to make it, how is it a random alchemist tossed it together?

Quote:But he could not make him turn human. Mordecai then named him Wallace, since he did not know what his real name was. Since then, Wallace has gone with Mordecai and will never follow anyone's command but Mordecai's as long as Mordecai is alive.

Also, why didn't Mordecai take him to partake in the ritual to turn human? Either in the Blackwald, or Darnassus? Did Wallace not wish to? I'd advise rethinking this as quest text states...

It is time, <name>. This... alchemy that has kept the beast inside you at bay will not last for long.
The first cursed worgen were night elf druids like our new allies. They, however, abandoned the balance that the rest of their kind embraced and allowed the beast to take over their minds.
It is only fitting that their brethren be the ones that deliver us from the Curse. Go, <class>. Drink from the waters of Tal'doren and make peace with yourself.


Why does Wallace follow Mordecai as a "master"? Worgen do follow something of a pack order, but why does Mordecai warrant such loyalty from Wallace?

Quote:Wallace never liked getting into unecessary trouble, which happened often due to Mordecai's thievery. Mordecai tried to make him a more subtle and silent Worgen, but Wallace had no interest at all in becoming a sneaker and so Mordecai decided to make Wallace his brute pet. Later, Mordecai decided to make a society for all the thieves in Azeroth, named The Candle Light Society. Wallace wondered how he would fit in at all, having no subtle attributes. But Mordecai made him the muscle of the society. His hatred for Gnomes and Goblins comes from earlier encounters, as all of the Gnomes and Goblins he has met were unpleasant and rude.

Not too much issue with this part, though did the dislike of gnomes and goblins come from RP? I ask, since it is unlikely Wallace would have met either until Cataclysm.

All in all, you have an alright start. Another thing I wish to bid you to be very, very careful with is Wallace's bestial nature. Worgen are not pets, they are not animals. They, despite their savagery, are cunning and intelligent--Wallace's human "stupidity" aside. So, be very careful about RPing Wallace as just a dog on two legs.
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#11
(08-13-2013, 07:04 AM)unidragon Wrote: History: Wallace started off as a Human brawler from Silverpine Forest named Darwin. He was a very strong fighter even before the curse hit him, but also rather stupid. He didn't always obey the rules, but mainly because he didn't know about some of them. He stayed away from people because his behavior wasn't appreciated by some people.

The start seems a little strange to me? What does stupid mean? What rules didn't he know about? Who is his brother, and why wasn't he appreciated? And what does that have to do with Wallace?

He was just not bright, slow and dim. I cut out the 'rules' part and changed it. And where did you get brother from? His behavior amongst people was inappropriate.

Quote:When the attack was over, he had no idea where he was or what had happened, he simply observed the scene around him and then ran off to the forest. He tried to find his way back to Silverpine Forest, but got lost and had no where to go. But a Gilnean named Mordecai found him and experimented with him to see if he could turn him civilized and less feral, in which he succeeded.

This right here is kind of a problem. What methods did Mordecai use to bring sanity back to Wallace? The cure is a huge breakthrough, made by royal chemist Krennan Arannas, not to be handed out willy nilly. If it took that guy so much effort and time to make it, how is it a random alchemist tossed it together?

I changed that a bit. Have a look.

Quote:But he could not make him turn human. Mordecai then named him Wallace, since he did not know what his real name was. Since then, Wallace has gone with Mordecai and will never follow anyone's command but Mordecai's as long as Mordecai is alive.

Also, why didn't Mordecai take him to partake in the ritual to turn human? Either in the Blackwald, or Darnassus? Did Wallace not wish to? I'd advise rethinking this as quest text states...

It is time, <name>. This... alchemy that has kept the beast inside you at bay will not last for long.
The first cursed worgen were night elf druids like our new allies. They, however, abandoned the balance that the rest of their kind embraced and allowed the beast to take over their minds.
It is only fitting that their brethren be the ones that deliver us from the Curse. Go, <class>. Drink from the waters of Tal'doren and make peace with yourself.


Why does Wallace follow Mordecai as a "master"? Worgen do follow something of a pack order, but why does Mordecai warrant such loyalty from Wallace?

Mordecai was not aware of the ritual to turn human, simple as that.
Mordecai trained him and took care of him. Wallace found trust in Mordecai.

Quote:Wallace never liked getting into unecessary trouble, which happened often due to Mordecai's thievery. Mordecai tried to make him a more subtle and silent Worgen, but Wallace had no interest at all in becoming a sneaker and so Mordecai decided to make Wallace his brute pet. Later, Mordecai decided to make a society for all the thieves in Azeroth, named The Candle Light Society. Wallace wondered how he would fit in at all, having no subtle attributes. But Mordecai made him the muscle of the society. His hatred for Gnomes and Goblins comes from earlier encounters, as all of the Gnomes and Goblins he has met were unpleasant and rude.

Not too much issue with this part, though did the dislike of gnomes and goblins come from RP? I ask, since it is unlikely Wallace would have met either until Cataclysm.

Yes, his hatred for Gnomes and Goblins came from later RP.

All in all, you have an alright start. Another thing I wish to bid you to be very, very careful with is Wallace's bestial nature. Worgen are not pets, they are not animals. They, despite their savagery, are cunning and intelligent--Wallace's human "stupidity" aside. So, be very careful about RPing Wallace as just a dog on two legs.
[/quote]

Since Wallace had a major memory loss, and the fact that he wasn't very bright from the start, Mordecai took advantage of this and trained him as an overgrown dog.
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#12
Hurr. For the "brother" thing, my brain derped and decided to add another word or something.

I'll step aside and let the Forum Helpers do their thing now. But please, please reconsider looking at and playing Wallace as a "dog". Or at least, elaborate on what you mean by that. Worgen have lupine instincts and mannerisms but they are not dogs.
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#13
Quote:Mordecai trained him and took care of him. Wallace found trust in Mordecai.
Quote:Since Wallace had a major memory loss, and the fact that he wasn't very bright from the start, Mordecai took advantage of this and trained him as an overgrown dog.

Here's the thing- a Worgen with the medicinal cure, having regained their sanity, is generally back to his human self as far as intelligence and free thinking goes. Wallace would not be able to be "trained" any more than you can "train" another human being. Yes you can condition and train a human like an animal but that takes years of effort.

Worgen that are feral are not meager beasts who can be tamed or domesticated. They have individual, independent intelligence, no matter how "dim" or brutish they may be. You can no easily train one than you could train a Savagekin druid, because despite their animalistic behavior and feral nature, they are still intelligent, individual thinkers.
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#14
Okay, I changed pet to friend. He sees Mordecai as his older brother of sorts, though not related in any way. So please forget all about the pet/dog thing.
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#15
Looking much better, unidragon!

Could I first ask you to space out his history into separate paragraphs? It makes it much easier to read.

I'd also like to see some expansion to Wallace's personality. Try adding more about his emotions and feelings, and how he acts in a conversation. Similarly, could you explain his hatred for gnomes and goblins? You mention it comes from earlier encounters, but all gnomes and goblins being rude to him is a little odd - just add a bit more clarification to it.
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