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RPregnancy - A Guide to RPing a Pregnant Character [WIP]
#1
As the title states, this is a WIP. Been at this thing for a number of weeks, but I figure I'd post it now to see what people say and think. Still not finished!

Do keep feedback civil. This subject is probably touchy, but I took care to research and spoke to a number of people for feedback before I posted here.

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c0rzilla's and ImagenAyshun's Guide to Role Playing Pregnancy

Pregnancy.

What's your first reaction to that word? Hope? Inspiration? Thoughts about "the miracle of life"?

Fear? Disgust?

Apathy?

As complicated as pregnancy and childbirth is in the real world, you'd think it'd be easy enough to deal with in our escapism that is role playing.

Wrong-O.

Whyso?

Because pregnancy is mired in myths, legends, urban tales, and badly written tropes.

Of course, none of this makes you bad, or a bad writer if you're caught up in them. It's just the way these things work!

However, in this guide, I (with the aid of other contributors) hope to shed some light on, and guide the community of CotH toward a better understanding of this complicated part of life. For our roleplaying, and perhaps real life.

Spoiler:
[Image: themoreyouknow.gif]

Do note, that some things in this guide might be unsettling, an issue or two controversial to some. Anyone who contributed to this realizes every pregnancy is different. I won't be getting into the squishy details of every bit. This is intended as a general guide to facts and misconceptions that often pop up in Role Play and Media.

Please take this for what it is and no more.


The Stages


I'll start the meat of this guide off with a basic rundown of the stage sof pregnancy, month by month.

Reminds you of your old health class in high school, right?

Important details can easily be overlooked or forgotten in the rush to roleplay a happy family. Details that can enhance your character's experience and depth.

c0rzilla's Notes Wrote:
How Soon a Pregnancy Can be Detected
Note: This is based on c0rzilla's interpretation of lore and magic

As far as modern detection goes, it takes one to two weeks after implantation.

The technology in Warcraft is highly lacking in things to detect how expectant a woman is. Therefore, a deal of people resort to magical detection, usually aimed at detecting the fetus' soul.

This is not as easy as it sounds. Why?

While there is magic that deals in the soul, the soul of the bundle of cells that make up the early stages of pregnancy would be too tiny to detect. As well, when you think about it, soul-detecting is a prime opportunity for meta-gaming. Want to easily see if someone's spying on you? Check the area for souls.

The Light is perhaps the best for this. However, there won't be much to be detected until much later in the pregnancy. A microscopic ball of cells that isn't yet sentient won't have much of a soul to sense.

Shaman deal with souls, but only in terms of their past ancestors. The dead, not the yet-to-be-born. They can also divine a future for the child, but it may not be accurate.

The priests of the Loa as well deal in souls. But, only in terms of appeasing angry spirits, and capturing the souls of their enemies in shrunken heads.

Warlocks deal in souls, but only insofar as they can drain them. And, I don't think you'd want that near your fetus.

Month 1
The baby is an embryo consisting of two layers of cells from which all their organs and body parts will develop. This double layer is called a blastocyst.

Month 2
The baby is now about the size of a kidney bean and is constantly moving. It has distinct, slightly webbed fingers.

Month 3
By now the baby is about three inches long and weighs nearly an ounce. At about fourteen weeks is when the "bulge" might appear. Its eyesight, though the eyelids are fused shut, is sensitive enough to detect light. If a bright enough light is shined on the mother's stomach, it will react.

Month 4
The baby is now about five inches long and weighs five ounces. The skeleton is starting to harden from rubbery cartilage to bone. The sense of hearing starts to sharpen here as well. This is also about when the mother will feel the classic kicking. Achiness is also very likely, due to the stretching of the mother's ligaments around the uterus.

Month 5
Vericose veins and stretch marks can develop for the mother in this month. Edema, a swelling of the ankles as the growing uterus puts pressure on certain veins, develops here as well. As far as the growth of the baby, it continues to develop from month four.

Month 6
Here, the baby weighs about a pound and a half. Its wrinkled skin is starting to smooth out as it puts on baby fat. The uterus is putting such pressure on certain veins, that the mother may feel dizzy if she lies down for too long. The baby's response to sounds grows further. The mother may now feel the baby's hiccups as well.

Month 7
Minor contractions may appear here, and are quite normal. They are called Braxton-Hicks contractions. The baby can now distinguish between light and dark, and sleeps and wakes regularly.

Month 8
As the baby's lungs are fully developed here (or developed enough), if it is born it can survive outside the mother. The uterus is about fifteen times its original size and might poke under the mother's ribs. The Braxton-Hicks contractions continue, perhaps a little more frequent.

Month 9
The last one! Remember in movies or TV shows, the frantic mother yelling about her water breaking? That means the amniotic fluid is leaking flowing out from a ruptured amniotic sac. And labor has started.

Misconceptions


There are many myths and much information that has been spread about pregnancy. I will break this into two parts, following it up with what really happens.

The parts are as follows:

Myths about pregnancy itself

Myths about miscarriage

Quote:
Pregnancy Myths
1) Pregnancy is a fulfilling, life affirming experience.

Spoiler:
[Image: 385629_256323377791305_228291757261134_5...jpg?139d23]

Wrong. Or, at least, wrong in that almost no one will live up to the Hollywood depiction of pregnancy and childbirth. Not even your amazing character! A myriad of psychological, social, hormonal, and situational factors will influence your character and their attitude.

Pregnancy is hard. The changes a female body goes through are monumental, and sometimes irreversable. Pregnancy is not a tattoo, it isn't a new piece of jewlery.

It is very, exceedingly likely your character will succumb to anxiety and depression. And that isn't something your character (or you) should feel ashamed of! As many stories as there are out there of the glorious gift that a baby is believed to be, a character experiencing all these different emotions would be interesting.

2) Queasiness will end with the first trimester

Classic morning sickness, one of the signs for pregnancy. It can happen every day, all day, right up through all three trimesters.

Not much to elaborate on here!

3) Your skin will glow

Ah, the glow of motherhood. Surely a sign of the blessing that is the bundle of joy to come.

Not quite.

This glow comes from an increase in bloodflow to nourish the fetus, and changes in hormones. Things like skintags, spider veins, and change in pigmentation can and will appear.

The less serene and classic signs of pregnancy are often not role played, or taken into consideration. Development could be had from a character horrifed by the changes in physical appearance.

4) The second, or pushing, stage of labor goes quickly

If you choose to role play giving birth, this bit is important.

It isn't quick. This stage can many hours, perhaps a couple days, as a new mother's muscles aren't developed for this kind of strain yet.

Quote:
Miscarriage Myths
1) Stress

Stress will not cause a miscarriage. If this happened every time a mother had a bad day, imagine the dent on the population. Even tragic occurances won't cause the body to purge the baby.

2) Sex

Sex will not cause a miscarriage. I won't get into the inner details, but the mechanics will do no more than sooth the fetus to sleep.

3) Lifting Heavy Things

Nope. The body will make a mother drop the heavy thing long before any harm can be done.

4) Getting Hit or Kicked in the Stomach

This is one of two huge myths, the other being falling.

No


The fetus is incredibly well protected. Unless the character is in the very last bit of the last trimester and is being constantly pounded on, your character will not miscarry from a sock to the gut.

The female body is designed to carry, nourish, and protect a fetus. It isn't handing it over so easily. Imagine if, over history, every woman that got struck like this miscarried. Imagine the dent in the human population.

5) Falling

Again.

No


Unless the character fell a height that could seriously injure her, right on her stomach, in the second trimester or on, this will not cause a miscarriage.

Facts: While extremes of violence can cause a miscarriage, most of them are caused by chromosomal defects very very early on, hormonal defects, defects in the uterus or cervix, immunal disorders, age, chronic disease, or labor that is somehow induced by the body (not a fall) too early.

Most will remain unexplained, as painful as that is. The unkown is the worst to deal with. The truth is, by the time a miscarriage starts, the fetus has been dead for a long while. Almost all miscarriages happen so early, that they can be indistinguishable from a regular menstural flow.

So, please. Before you give your character a baby just to toss away for "character development", take into consideration these facts. Miscarriage may seem like an easy way to make your character deep and tragic, but it can be easily misused, misguided, and misinterpreted.


Psychological Stress


In addition to getting the physical and biological aspects of pregnancy frequently misunderstood, there are psychological and social attributes surrounding pregnancy. The general belief is that pregnant women are at their happiest because they are fulfulling their "womanly duties" or the very fact of holding a child within their body fosters well being. In reality, especially for women with personal or family history of mental illnesses, psychological disorders can arise during pregnancy, childbirth, and even after giving birth.

This does NOT mean, however, that you are to RP your pregnant lady as a raving sociopath who will mow down entire armies to eat a herd of kodos raw.

Here is a tidbit:

http://womensneuroscience.stanford.edu/w...nancy.html Wrote:Given the numerous physiological and hormonal changes the body undergoes and the stressors involved in pregnancy, anxiety and depression are the most common emotional disturbances during the perinatal period. Reported rates of depression in pregnant women have ranged from 5% to almost 30%. In very mild cases, symptoms are usually manageable with counseling, support groups, environmental manipulation, and diversions such as walking, warm baths, and keeping up social contacts. When the depression and anxiety does not respond to these approaches, professional psychotherapy is recommended. Brief hospital stays, intensive outpatient programs, or, for more severe cases, medication may effectively treat the illness.


Bear in mind, however, that 5%-30% is still a small statistic--at its worst, 3 out of 10 women would be diagnosed with major depressive disorder or panic disorder during their pregnancy. But given these numbers, nonetheless, it should scream to you that pregnancy is typically NOT a happy time. Even a mentally healthy woman who is well-taken-care of will still suffer the stress and frustration of being pregnant.

Take note that RPing of mental disorders is often discouraged and even banned for some specific illnesses (such as Disassociative Identity Disorder). Even given the information provided above, RPing out depression in general can also be discouraged. However, given the changes in the body, hormones, diet, dress, movement, mobility, and even social reactions (which we'll get to below), your pregnant lady will surely feel the burden of stress pressing onto her, resulting in what would be a very unhappy and frustrated woman.

(WIP)


Pregnancy Tropes


Tropes! That one amusing site and concept that can split people into arguing sides about legitimacy and taking things too seriously.

I find tropes are a fine (and amusing) guide for writing, discovering, and identifying themes and types.

Here I will list a few tropes that pop up in writing about pregnancy.

Quote:Babies Make Everything Better - Your character is pregnant, has the child. Somehow, the bundle of joy fixes everything in your character's life just by existing. A previously broken relationship is made whole, she makes new friends, she suddenly finds her purpose in life.

While a baby can be a tremendous blessing, it can also add untold strain on a relationship. Especially an already cracked one. A child is not a proof of how much your character loves their partner. Its presence will not magically fix your character's issues, or your character's partner's issues. While babies certainly enjoy new toys, they are not new toys themselves.

A related trope is The Baby Trap.

Convenient Miscarriage - Writers of television shows (and roleplayers) tend to use this trope when having the child will change the character too much for the audence (or the player). It adds a very shallow depth to the character, that lasts only so long as people will pity her. This trope can also be used to avoid the controversial topic of abortion.

Not to say a miscarriage can't add depth. But, unfortunately, lack of knowledge of such a tragic experience leads people to believe it's an easy tool.

Fantasy Contraception - Azeroth and other medieval fantasy worlds very much lack our usual brand of birth control.

What to do?

Make something up! Herbs, to magical trinkets, to species just plain not working with each other.

This isn't necessarily something based on ignorance, or just plain lazy writing. In fact, the writer may be trying to be responsible. It can be a tad forced when the writer is trying to prove they are responsible, rather than their character(s).

Law of Inverse Fertility - According to this fine example of science, a couple's fertility is inversely proportional to their want to have a child.

English? More a character wants a baby, the less chance they'll have one. This also extends to surrogates and adoption.

On the other hand, a woman who really doesn't want to get pregnant conceives in a snap. This applies to teenagers and their first time as well.

Why? As the article says, the opposite doesn't make for a good story.

Magical Abortion - What happens when a character gets pregnant, but the writer doesn't want to address the issue of abortion or miscarriage directly?

Find a magical trinket/spell/whathaveyou to make the baby disappear. This trope is usually related to plots that involve the fetus being evil in some way.

Morning Sickness - This is the number one way to hint at a pregnancy outside of a missed period.

Granted, in real life, morning sickness is highly variable from woman to woman.

A character is even more likely to be pregnant if she insists it must be some other illness.

Pregnant Badass - In real life, a mother with a normal pregnancy goes about her daily business as best she can.

The character this trop belongs to will be in the middle of the bloody fray every month until labor. And even then, she may only take a break to have the child, then jump right back in.

It can get a tad silly.

Pregnant Hostage - A heavily pregnant hostage adds a certain kind of drama to a hostage situation. This isn't really lazy writing, but it is classic (old), and can be a tad cliche.

Further Reading: Jonoth's Getting Down: Love and Eroticism in Roleplay
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#2
All of my love. This is a much needed guide for those who don't know how pregnancy works.
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[4:16:27 PM] Cristovao di Silvio ( @"CappnRob"): theres the bar. then theres the bottom of the barrel, then theres you sachi
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#3
Quote:This does NOT mean, however, that you are to RP your pregnant lady as a raving sociopath who will mow down entire armies to eat a herd of kodos raw.

Don't roleplay as my pregnant wife, gotcha.


Other than that, I... don't know what to think here. I mean, it's probably better to have something like this and... have people roleplaying it silly, but from my own standpoint pregnancy is so widely different and varied from woman to woman that there are some parts of this guide that could easily be debated, especially the idea of "Fulfilling" or not, and other things like the miscarriage "myths". Truth be told, a lot of miscarriages don't have a known factor, and sometimes a woman's uteral lining can be weak enough to were those things (Except sex, that's just kinda... heh.) -could- possibly cause someone to lose a child.

I almost think there needs to be another section to this guide, being "Why even RP being pregnant". It's like the missing link to this thread, heh.
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#4
(04-09-2012, 05:50 PM)Rensin Wrote:
Quote:This does NOT mean, however, that you are to RP your pregnant lady as a raving sociopath who will mow down entire armies to eat a herd of kodos raw.

Don't roleplay as my pregnant wife, gotcha.

Lawl.

(04-09-2012, 05:50 PM)Rensin Wrote: Other than that, I... don't know what to think here. I mean, it's probably better to have something like this and... have people roleplaying it silly, but from my own standpoint pregnancy is so widely different and varied from woman to woman that there are some parts of this guide that could easily be debated, especially the idea of "Fulfilling" or not, and other things like the miscarriage "myths". Truth be told, a lot of miscarriages don't have a known factor, and sometimes a woman's uteral lining can be weak enough to were those things (Except sex, that's just kinda... heh.) -could- possibly cause someone to lose a child.

Indeed, I did mention that the point is gotten it's impossible to really catalogue every variation in every circumstance. This is general. This guide comes from stereotypes that people tend to take as common, and fact, and something they should write (as opposed to live) up to.

And, aye, I included that mention about miscarriages as well. Again, this is general.

Quote:I almost think there needs to be another section to this guide, being "Why even RP being pregnant". It's like the missing link to this thread, heh.

I might consider including that!
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#5
It might honestly make this a little stronger, since... y'know, if everyone starts to RP as being pregnant, yadda yadda.

Basically!

Spoiler:
Sex can be just sex without there being a pregnancy every time. We have control over that, since it's roleplay.
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#6
I have other factors to add such as WoW racial attitudes towards pregnancy based on sociological factors already present in the established lore. That'll have to come soon!
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#7
(04-09-2012, 04:52 PM)c0rzilla Wrote: Fantasy Contraception - Azeroth and other medieval fantasy worlds very much lack our usual brand of birth control.

What to do?

Make something up! Herbs, to magical trinkets, to species just plain not working with each other.

This isn't necessarily something based on ignorance, or just plain lazy writing. In fact, the writer may be trying to be responsible. It can be a tad forced when the writer is trying to prove they are responsible, rather than their character(s).

This one amused me if only because I jokingly hint at the idea of interracial couplings (like troll/orc) to avoid pregnancy.

Contraception itself is pretty age-old as far as methods go, so it may not be what we're used to today but I bet there are plenty of RL equivalents for the time. But Blizzard itself probably would not have touched deeply on the subject because it could be considered controversial.
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#8
Well, some interracial couples do actually work.

http://www.wowpedia.org/Half-ogre

Rexxar is a great case for this, however, that also starts to flirt with whether or not GMs will allow that sort of thing, and more often than not they won't. It's very, very rare that these sort of couplings happen as well, considering that usually they are practices of trying to mix breeding among races to gain some sort of strength.

As Immy said, one of the large factors in play here is racial feelings towards pregnancy, and how it's viewed, as well as the idea of breeding as presented here. Not everything is based around love and pure sex, as sometimes people believe it to be.

Which is another hard line here, what are we trying to convey? I think that IC pregnancy is a slippery slope that can be interpreted so many ways, that no matter what happens there will be at least a handful of people saying "You're doing it wrong." I think it's why Blizz is intentionally vague on the matter of sex, love, and childbirth within the universe, because it's not something that's easy to comprehend from a roleplay or literal standpoint until you've gone through it, and even then you -may- be putting too much real life instances into a fantasy universe, where said tropes may apply.

I guess the... -best- way I can say this is a very silly but hopefully relevant example. If I wanted to roleplay my character smoking cigarettes, there are items in game to suggest that there is tobacco usage, and even mechanical lighters. However, when we start talking about "Contraceptives" and "Contraception"... there's no in game version of a condom so to speak.





This is getting so very not PG-13, which is another problem with pregnancy RP. It's... adult. Probably one of the most adult aspects of life there is.
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#9
(04-09-2012, 07:39 PM)Rensin Wrote: If I wanted to roleplay my character smoking cigarettes, there are items in game to suggest that there is tobacco usage, and even mechanical lighters. However, when we start talking about "Contraceptives" and "Contraception"... there's no in game version of a condom so to speak.





This is getting so very not PG-13, which is another problem with pregnancy RP. It's... adult. Probably one of the most adult aspects of life there is.

Lambs and their various parts (skin, intestines, bladder) were used for condoms!

I see sheep all over Elwynn.

And, yes. Adult stuff. This is why I didn't go into the squishy details.
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#10
Ahh, yes, lambskin.

And. Yeah. Haha.

See, there's a detail about that sort of stuff that is hard to share on a PG-13 forum, let's just say. Boy, this is difficult to talk about.

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#11
What's astonishing is people who actually RP being pregnant.

:B



To all their own.
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#12
Though I don't think I'll ever RP a pregnant woman -I'm just not as good with women- I've read this guide top to bottom, and I think it's very well made and useful for those who are good with women and would actually enjoy RPing a pregnant one. And who knows, maybe one day I'll be the one to try this?

Great work, you guys! :D Hug
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#13
An addition for tropes might be herbal abortion?
There are common that folksongs and even stories mention plants that was thought and some actually had that effect on the body.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tansy is one example.


Quote:4) Getting Hit or Kicked in the Stomach
5) Falling
You touch the fact that violence can induce an early labour which is basically a miscarrige. But from your phrasing I get the feeling that babies are super protected and that is not true.

Physical trauma if bad enough will make you loose your baby, there's a point where the mothers body gives up the child to save the mother. A good example would be severe burns on large portions of the body, especially the torso or rupturing internal organs from one or several blows.

Just saying it perhaps should be rephrased cause babies and mothers do get hurt even if they aren't as fragile as some may think.


Not sure if you are gonna write about the aftermath of a birth but one detail that is often overlooked is that the stomach muscles of a woman are seperated during the pregnancy and it will take a few weeks before she can sit up straight use the straight stomach muscles.

And another thing that might be useful in your guide is: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Postpartum_depression


And another random note is that the pregnancy AND childbirth tend to get easier with every child you have, even if you have a C-section done.


(If everyone being pregnant actually RPed the full nine months I'd not mind the other details and be a happy Bovel.)
(02-24-2012, 10:15 AM)Piroska Wrote: Conspiracy. That's all it is; Kret's afraid that your pure, digital awesomeness would crash the server if it were allowed.
(06-14-2013, 05:42 PM)McKnighter Wrote: Bovel, Lord of Beards

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#14
I thought I added postpartum depression already. Ah, well.
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#15
Very nice guide, easy to read and follow. Looking forward to those fertility charts. (Such a nerd I know)
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