The Fine Line Between Online And Offline.
#16
Wow thanks for stepping up and making this thread. I'll admit that I sometimes have trouble with this. I don't have an issue with attaching to other players though- just my characters. I luuuurve them and I think where the issue lies is that most people do get involved with their own characters.

Everyone says it is just a game- and yes, this is true, but when you rp you add more of yourself to the game than what you normally would. Creating characters, writing stories, developing plotlines, overseeing events and not to mention just acting as that character for hours on end is in itself putting your identity into the game. Do most of the above almost every day for months and you have an attachment.

Some people scream like banshees about how a character is not who you are. Shenanigans. RP is creative writing, improv acting, etc. etc. It is art and art you create is part of you. <3

So when trouble brews and rp becomes dramatic (in the good or bad way), it's increasingly difficult to separate IC and OOC or as the OP put it, Online and Offline.

So I can completely understand why, when rp becomes inundated with stressful situations, that players take it to heart. As I've gotten older I have learned to recognize when I am not in a good place to deal with IC drama oocly. That's when I take a little me time or I try and talk to whoever is the source of that stress. I let them know that they are coming on too strong or whatever.

However, there is never an excuse for stalking someone (just no! bad!) or believing an rp romance is reality (unless the other person claimed to share your feelings). It would also seem that scary scenarios like that are not a rare occurrence. So I would just suggest that if you find yourself believing you're in love with a player, ask yourself why. Do you even hang out much oocly?
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#17
Once again it perfectly worked out and now we're the best lovers in earth ._.


Also. What do you mean "Some people scream like banshees about how a character is not who you are". That's pretty much seeming totally stupid to me. :o
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#18
I mean, some people defend violently (as violent as text can get hehe) that no part of a player is part of their character. Not even a little grain. I simply disagree with that. And no, I don't think you are literally your character-- now that would be stupid.
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#19
Nightharrow, you have a point in that what you create is ultimately derived from what you have learned or experienced thus far. I think the 'You are not your character' argument applies more to those who have no concept of what a character is and thus play as themselves - taking everything personally as a result.

As for immersion, I think its fine to immerse a little ( experience life as your character as one naturally does with books and movies ) so long as the characters involved do not become a part of your life or affect real life decisions ;p

I can understand not wanting a character to die because you enjoy using that character for plots, stories or whatever. But the attachment should be no more than that of your attachment to your favorite pen or toy. If the death or injury of such a character would cause emotional distress then perhaps its time to detach a little.

Just my opinion...
- Cepht -

Randian - Sin'dorei Priest, Representative of Greystone Charities
Riley Gillespie aka "Stars" - Unhinged forsaken vagabond with a flare for fire
Alonus - Fallen holy priest with a pet serpent named "Ricky"
Haugus Bach - Forsaken Warlock with an appetite for torture and revenge. Previously a humble shoe maker.
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#20
If you don't put a part of yourself (irl) to a character (irp) you shouldn't RP.
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#21
Experiencing emotions while IC is a good thing, but only IC. Emotions while in character can help with creating a realistic environment and making RP fun. Good writing/reading/RP/movies/plays/etc. are supposed to make us feel emotion. Otherwise, the entire experience would be pointless. The important part is to distinguish between fantasy and reality. If my favorite character in a book dies, I don't mope and cry for three days, I feel sad during his death scene. Maybe I feel a little sad for a bit afterwords, but that's it.
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#22
To add to the point, in retail wow, some girl fell in love with me over the net. Yo, I gotta say I didn't know what to say, I tried explaining to her that it'd be cool for her to go out and meet some real people. She never logged on again.. now I dunno what happened after that. Did she harm her self, or like take in my advice but to the extreme and stopped playing? I dunno. But if anything does ever occur like this, it's hard for both parties.

So if you fell in love with someone over the net, follow the what is said on the first post.

If you are on the other side of the story, it can be hard too. You have to be careful if you don't want to hurt the other player, but no matter what you will do will hurt the person. It's a matter of causing the least damage possible and perhaps, they get hurt but in the long run they feel better. Don't do a "sally" if you want the other person to be alright in the long run, and harm them selves, because there are cases where stuff like that happens. Try and persuade them to relax and do something else. Atleast that way there is a chance of something good happening... the people who find it easy to develop a relation over the internet are the people who generally are missing something key in their social life.

On the other hand, you can do a "Sally" and leave, it's understandable, and no one can judge you if you do. But it's probably not the most constructive solution.

Anyway, peace.
"Even a stopped clock, tells the right time twice a day."
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#23
I met my boyfriend through a roleplayed relationship. Such stories appear to be common though.

I know that I sometimes apologize to people if I really offend their characters or if I yell at their characters. The usual reply is "It's okay, it's just RP." but I still feel bad. :V

Sadron Wrote:If my favorite character in a book dies, I don't mope and cry for three days, I feel sad during his death scene. Maybe I feel a little sad for a bit afterwords, but that's it.

I felt sad for a week after finishing To Kill a Mockingbird. Heh.
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#24
I met my boyfriend through roleplay too, though we didn't start off with romance rp. At the same time I have done romance rp with other people but I am not dating them, and I assume they know that I'm not interested in dating them. That's what we mean by the fine line thing, not everyone is available just because they rp romance.

To add to that I've seen people get upset because they went to romance rp with another character, and found out the roleplayer was not the same gender as their respective character.
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#25
Wuvvums Wrote:To add to that I've seen people get upset because they went to romance rp with another character, and found out the roleplayer was not the same gender as their respective character.

Ohhh, this. This big time. I've seen a ton of awkward situations arise because of this.
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#26
Probably one of the best examples of the manner I ever saw, at least in its simplicity.

Good job!
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#27
Norah1 Wrote:
Wuvvums Wrote:To add to that I've seen people get upset because they went to romance rp with another character, and found out the roleplayer was not the same gender as their respective character.

Ohhh, this. This big time. I've seen a ton of awkward situations arise because of this.

I've never understood the problem with this, yet it makes people cringe.
Some erotica is written by men and other men enjoy it.
Porn is written/directed/filmed by men and men enjoy it.

Rule of the thumb for the internet ... Everyone is an asexual creature! Plus, we're all habitual liars! So take it all with a grain of salt!

You can be friends with anyone, as long as you know where your trust in them ends. :P
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